Episode 34 VS 7 Point 5: Altruistic Motives
by Voyager Season 7.5
Summary: Kes undertakes a mission to find a new home for the Ocampa where they can thrive beneath the sun. On her journey she enlists the help of some old friends, including Dr. Denara Pel of Vidiia, where the cure for the Phage has created as many problems as it has solved. Spoilers: Many episodes, but especially "Cold Fire" and "Fury"
1. Sanctuary Part 1

**Sanctuary**  
**A Prologue to "Altruistic Motives"**  
**by jamelia**

_Spoiler: Meanwhile, back in the Delta Quadrant...An uneasy spirit attempts to better the lives of her people. Takes place during the same time as_ Reconstruction Blues.

* * *

**Ocampa:**

**Earthdate March 20, 2380 Stardate 56079.7**

Swirls of color, planets and suns and exploding stars, gradually coalescing into galaxies...then into glittering crystals of rock which flowed through fault lines of sediments that dated back to another time, a time when Ocampa's surface sparkled with shallow seas of azure waters and was seen from space to be flecked with drifts of fluffy white, nucleogenic-rich clouds of life-giving weather systems. Her perceptions were sharp. She tasted the tang of copper, caught a whiff of precious, time-fracturing, quartz-like dilithium crystals hidden deep within a far-off vein of amethyst. Only when she was prepared to give up her search did she recognize at last what she had been seeking: the chiming-bell sound of paragithium- -flowing like an underground river inside the bowels of Ocampa.

Bright light reflecting from bouncing molecules of air almost blinded her when she finally emerged from the rock wall. She took on a ghostly, misty form in front of the young man who was standing before the wall watching for her. He shivered as Kes pieced myriad bits of subatomic particles back together into a body.

After several seconds when both stood there in silence, he raised his left hand in the air and waved it near her shoulder, as if he wanted to pat her on her back to comfort her but wasn't quite sure she was solid enough for him to do so. Instead he lowered his hand back to his side, asking solicitously, "Does it hurt?"

"No, not really," Kes replied, her voice croaking deeply with the effort of speech. "Some days it takes a little more work gathering myself back together." A flicker of amusement crossed over her face as she took in several quick gulps of air and completed the transformation back into a being with a body. Some mornings it took a little more work to get herself together now when she'd remained perfectly solid all night long. 'You're not the dewy-eyed young thing you were when you first climbed to the surface, Kes,' she thought to herself.

Shaking her head as if to clear it of the last vestiges of its other state, she continued aloud, "The vein of paragithium runs deep, and it widens within the rock face at an eighty-five degree angle to the right, sloping down at a twenty-five degree angle first, then more steeply after fifty-seven meters to a forty-five degree angle."

He pulled a small computerized recording device from out of his pocket and punched in the figures. "You're amazing. How do you know so precisely when you're flowing through it like that?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know how I know, Josan. I just do..."

"Well, I know enough to believe you. Whenever we dig into the wall, you've been always right! "

Kes smiled wearily at the young metallurgist. "So far, anyway."

"Are you ready to walk back now?" Josan asked.

"I think I can manage, as long as you're willing to lend me a hand if I get a little shaky every now and then. I *am* an old lady now, you know!"

"You don't seem to be an old lady to me," Josan said graciously, bowing slightly and offering his arm to her in an elaborate motion.

Kes tucked her hand beneath his elbow and smiled at him, but she didn't continue the conversation. She knew very well what she looked like; she looked into the mirror every day, at least once. Right now, tired as she was, she must look positively ancient.

The pair walked slowly down the dimly-lit corridor cut into the rock during Kes' absence from Ocampa. Originally it had been an exploratory tunnel, earmarked to be used for homes, but the population balked about having to live in the narrow configurations the geologists recommended to insure the rock would remain strong enough to support their roofs. Kes could accept the scientific reasons underlying the recommendation, but she could also understand the reluctance of her people to build homes here.

Space in the Ocampan caves was growing scarce, and living underground really wasn't that bad, when all the alternatives were considered. Still, burrowing into solid rock and living in tiny warrens didn't seem to be the answer for her people either. The proposed homes seemed more like tombs to Kes, tombs where the ceiling could collapse upon one's head any time. Of course, the presence of the corridor had made it easier to explore for the paragithium Josan was extolling as they walked down it.

"...since you found so much, we'll be in really good shape now! Filaments for light and hard wiring for devices will be so much more efficient! In fact, I think the resonance of the mineral may increase our energy efficiency to 99.6% -just shy of perpetual motion!.

"Yes, but that's still shy of perpetual motion," Kes agreed. "I wish we could achieve that somehow. With the way the population is growing, we need all the power we can get."

"Not to mention room for homes. At least the mining operation may provide another corridor for apartments."

Kes smiled at the young man's echo of her own musings. "That's what they were supposed to be initially, remember? But no one wanted to live there."

"Well, no, but if we hollow it all out into another cavern when we're mining, maybe the apartments would be a better size and people wouldn't mind moving there."

"Perhaps," sighed Kes. "At the rate the population is exploding, people may not be able to be so picky about how big their apartments are in the future. It's not as if they're so big right now anyway." Her brow furrowed as a thought came to mind, one she'd considered and rejected before. Now it didn't seem so absurd a risk, but it still seemed too iffy to pursue.

As they walked, Josan commented casually, "You know, when you come out of the rock like that, you look the way I imagine one of those jennies you told us about must when coming out of..."

"Jennies?" Kes said in a puzzled tone as she turned her attention back to their conversation. A vision of the Delaney twins came to mind, but Josan knew nothing of them.

"Yes, you know. The jennies in the bottle. From the Earth stories you shared with us when you first came back."

"Oh! You mean *genies* in a bottle, from the 'Arabian Nights'! I'd forgotten all about that." She smiled slightly, reminiscing about her welcome home, when she was pumped for every memory she had of Voyager and her life and all the people and cultures she'd met "on the outside."

Just before they exited the corridor, Josan stopped short. The murmur of many voices working in the hydroponics gardens outside could be heard. Their ability to speak privately would soon be at an end. Facing her, Josan asked solemnly, "Kes, how are you, really? Our crew has been working you very hard lately. You look so tired and..." He paused, apparently reluctant to complete his thought.

Kes completed it for him. "Old. I look old, don't I? Like I'm twenty years old, instead of only 10?"

Her companion shuddered. "I can't imagine anyone that old."

"You will soon," Kes said, smiling enigmatically at the impossibly young man before her. He could easily be her grandson. Had she ever really been so young? Yes, she had been that young-far younger, even, when she'd first met Neelix and the crew of Voyager all those years ago on the surface of Ocampa. Giving his arm a squeeze she reassured him, "There will be a time when we reach the natural life span as ordained for us by our genetics, not the brief one the Caretaker imposed upon us with his 'sustenance,' along with his suppression of our fertility."

"Your theories haven't been accepted by the Council yet," he observed quietly.

"They haven't met the Ocampa I encountered on the outer space station. They reached the ages of fifteen and sixteen, and sometimes were even older. How many of our own people are living to eleven or twelve since the Caretaker died? And multiple births are the rule now rather than the exception. I'm sure he had the best of intentions, and maybe he just tried to stabilize the population and overdid it, but ..."

Their conversation was interrupted by the shouts of a young woman bursting out of the hydroponics cavern and into the corridor.

"Kes! Josan! I thought you would have been back long ago!" Lyrial gasped as she reached them. "Tyeris just had her triplets, Josan. A little boy and identical twin girls. She wants their Uncle Josan to be one of the first to meet them."

"That's wonderful! Is she all right? Are they all right?" he asked.

"They're all just fine, Josan. And Kes, can you come see them, too? Tyeris wants to show them off to everyone, I think, but especially to you."

"Tell her I'll come by later to see her wonderful new family. Right now I need to rest. I'm too tired to 'oo' and 'ah' over them as much as they deserve."

"Do you need help getting home? See, I knew turning into a jennie and sifting yourself through rocks is too hard on you," Josan said, in some alarm.

"I'm not so tired I can't get home. I just need a nap, that's all! Now go 'Uncle Josan'! Shoo!"

At Kes' urging, after she reassured the couple once again she would be able to return home just fine without them, Josan left with Lyrial to pay homage to the most perfect nephew and nieces ever born. Kes walked slowly back to her apartment, taking a short detour to pass through the potting area where she had spent so many happy hours as a child helping her mother and father.

Life was so different then. Predictable. Confining. Yet Kes was sure that had her parents lived longer lives, she would never have become so dissatisfied by her life and curious about the "outside" to risk everything by climbing to the surface to see for herself if the stories about its lifelessness were really true. And if she hadn't, where would she be right now? Dead, possibly. Without the intervention of Species 8472 or Tuvok's help, Kes would never have developed the ability to control her mind and physical being to the extent that she could help her people find what they needed to extend the power supplies bequeathed them by the Caretaker.

Somehow, knowing that wasn't enough to satisfy her. While she knew she was being of service to her people, there was even more she should do for them. She simply needed to find the courage to do it.

* * *

What Kes called her "apartment" was merely an alcove in one wall of the living space she shared with Josan and Lyrial, not a separate housing unit. Cut out of the rock across the cavern from one of the hydroponics farm bays, Kes' share of the dwelling was little more than a hollowed out area, barely big enough to contain a sleeping shelf, with a couple of small trunks tucked beneath it to hold her meager possessions, a chair, and a small desk with a box of PADDs she'd kept from her days on Voyager sitting on top of it. Small as it was, she was happy to have it. Many three- and even four-generation families made do with little more. Without husband or children, Kes had no true family members who could offer her a place to live, one of the bitter side-effects of the "one Elogium/one child per couple" days, when the only relatives one could expect to have were parents, direct descendants, or in-laws. Kes had none.

Kes lay down upon her bed without bothering to cover herself with a blanket or changing into clothes that were not sprinkled with dust particles captured when she began to reassemble into solid form during the last few seconds of her passage through mineral deposits. If she really wanted to, Kes could dematerialize and recoalesce her body, reconstituting her clothing at the same time so it would be nice and fresh and clean. She could even take away most (but not all) of the lines of her face and replace the faded, yellowed gray hair with a younger version of herself, although the young, dewy-eyed Kes she had been when she'd first encountered Neelix was gone forever. She'd tried to reassume that form in the past but found she could not maintain it long without draining her energy to such an extent it was hardly worth the trouble.

It was just as well. She was no longer that Kes. She was another kind of Ocampan female, one who knew what the Morelogium felt like, who had learned to control it so that she could move from one state to another at will. It took so much out of her, though! Energy conversation, she thought ruefully, wasn't only something the Ocampan people had to practice-it was something she herself needed to keep in mind, lest one day she dissipate into the air, unable to retrieve her body from sheer fatigue.

As she lay there, her thoughts turned to her daughter Linnis-or rather, to the daughter she and Tom would have had if things had turned out differently in linear time. The pang she usually felt when she thought of her lost future wasn't quite as unbearable as it used to be. Hailed as the marvel of her people and revered as the savior who was helping them eke out an existence within the bowels of Ocampa by providing the means for stretching their energy resources, Kes had learned to deal with the pain of never bearing a child of her own. Her actual Elogium was spent so far from Ocampa that no one compatible to mate with her was near when her time came. The memories of Linnis and Andrew Kim, who would have been Kes' grandson, would have to be enough for her.

Now that they no longer had the Caretaker's artificial food to consume, containing all the nutrients a nice little Ocampa needed for life-including the fertility suppressant that would have ensured the Ocampa would have died out in a few dozen generations more had the Caretaker survived as long as he'd thought-plenty of Ocampa children were being born to a people who were living longer and longer before slipping away into their Morelogiums. Although none yet had learned how manipulate the energy and matter of their own bodies to "come back" the way Kes could, she was sure the lessons would take eventually.

Until then, Kes could tolerate being called "Auntie" by her people. Perhaps someday she might be considered an Ocampan version of Earth's Eve, once they accepted what she had learned about the true nature of her people's life spans. Or perhaps Eve wasn't the right reference. Maybe she was a Prometheus, bringing to the Ocampa the knowledge that the Morelogium brought not death but a transformation into a different form of life, a non-corporeal state which could be reversed back to the corporeal when one was prepared and able to use the proper mental techniques to accomplish it.

Yes, if she were to delve into her memories of Earth mythology, Prometheus was the better reference. After all, she'd never found an Adam on her journeys, never experienced the bond Tuvok had felt for his T'Pel. She supposed it really was too much to expect to find a love like that. She had been so passionate to travel that the chances of meeting a person who might have been the great love of her life had been greatly reduced, although she cherished memories of her time with Neelix. He may have loved her jealously, almost too well, but her relationship with the Talaxian was the only time in her adult life she had been truly intimate with another person-in this time line, of course. Although her recollections of building a family with Tom Paris were of a time that had never really happened, she treasured them, too.

Kes shook herself, resolving to quit moping over romantic liaisons she now would never have. She was done with that sort of thing. She had a new role, a new vocation, and she took it seriously. Since she still felt shame over the way she'd once lost her way and the selfish way she had tried to deal with it, this was something she had to do. There was no more time for bitterness over what could not be.

She tossed and turned a few more times before arising from her bed and retrieving her lamp from the shelf above her desk. Seating herself on her chair, the lamp centered upon the desk before her, Kes concentrated upon the wick for a moment. It burst into flame. She smiled a little as she adjusted the degree of brightness downward, to just high enough a level to aid her in meditation. Staring into the dancing bit of fire, Kes sent her spirit outwards, expanding her mind until she felt the velocity of the powers of her mind stretch towards what she always thought of as Warp 10. Unlike when Tom Paris had experienced the phenomenon, Kes had no fear of evolving into a lizard (unless she chose, for some inexplicable reason, to assume that sort of body).

But her mind sped along, accelerating until, Q-like, she could feel the entire galaxy enclosed within her perceptions. She wasn't concerned with most of the galaxy, of course, nor did she even attempt to sense what was going on in the rest of the universe. She was only interested in a small corner of the Milky Way Galaxy, the part located about 70,000 light years from Ocampa-the corner of the Beta Quadrant not far from the Sol System, where a warm, dry planet circled around the star 40 Eridani A, where a close friend now dwelt. She touched his mind lightly, gaining strength from the knowledge that he was finally at home, back within the circle of his spouse and family, content with his life.

Using the skills he had taught her long ago, she meditated, considering carefully all of her options. Kes knew she had a decision to make. Were her journeying days truly over, as she had hoped the last time she had encountered her friend and mentor, just before she had traveled back home? Or did she still have tasks to do off her own planet, tasks which would change her life and those of all who lived beneath the barren crust, the dry shell that was Ocampa?


	2. Sanctuary Part 2

**ShahKar, Vulcan:  
****Earthdate March 20, 2380 Stardate 56079.8****  
**

"I sense another, Tuvok," said T'Pel. From the tight way she voiced her observation, Tuvok could have discerned her disquiet, even if their fingers were not interlaced one with the other's in the intimacy of the mind that meant so much to beings of their species- -a link which met so many needs of a Vulcan couple, but one which outsiders could never truly comprehend.

Silently, he reassured her. /It is Kes/

/Her spirit?/ T'Pel thought back to him.

/Without more precise data, I could not presume to categorize Kes' current state of being except to state that her sense of self is intact./

A ripple of amusement entered into his consciousness, so completely unlike the Vulcan appreciation of irony which comprised what he considered to be the equivalent of a sense of humor in his wife that he knew it could only have come from Kes. At the same time-he could only explain it in this way should he be asked, for no image or words came into his mind-he knew that Kes continued to maintain a corporeal form for a substantial portion of the time.

"Fascinating," T'Pel breathed, confirming that she, too, was privy to this perception through her continuing telepathic communication with Tuvok.

Carefully, he projected an image of the safe return of Voyager to Earth and of the well-being of those to whom Kes had been close. Again, without any awareness of how it was done, he perceived she was already cognizant of this and was pleased for all of the ship's crew. He also knew, without question, that Kes herself was home as well. He was able to "read" her as easily as he once had in his quarters on Voyager, when they would sit together as he taught her the disciplines of the mind she needed to control her latent gift. Tuvok could not contain his surprise. He was receiving messages from Kes-and sending to her in return-even though she was on Ocampa, all the way on the other side of the galaxy.

Swiftly he suppressed his emotions to prevent surprise from turning into shock, especially since he was still telepathically linked with his wife. Another ripple of amusement was transmitted, followed quickly by an element he could only describe as a contrite request for forgiveness, as Kes realized the private nature of the meditation she had interrupted.

Now Tuvok was in something of a quandary. Private meditation or no, the miraculous nature of a telepathic communication from one side of the galaxy to another almost demanded continuation if possible, if only to ascertain if by some means they could be assured of doing it again some time in the future. Somehow this must have been conveyed to her, because Tuvok could detect the clear presence of a question in Kes' mind, a question which, it seemed, was so compelling she had decided to try to sweep away the inconvenience of tens of thousands of light years of distance between them to initiate a mental communication with him-and had succeeded.

Before the full nature of the question had come into his mind, however, a momentary sense of disorientation occurred-as if still another mind was trying to wedge its way into the conversation.

The fragile telepathic connection between opposite ends of the galaxy shattered suddenly. Tuvok became completely aware of the touch of his wife's fingers between his own and surrendered to the comfort of her presence within his mind. Shakily, he drew a breath, unaware of how long he might have been holding it. Opening his eyes, he looked into the warmth of his wife's gaze.

"Should I be concerned about the status of our union, since you seem to be sharing thoughts with another?" T'Pel said quietly, but with a quizzically arched eyebrow raised high to erase any hint that she was truly accusing him of an infidelity.

"You need not be," he assured her, his own eyebrow raised in answer, but he found he was unwilling to release her hand from his.

T'Pel's free hand caressed their joined ones lightly in a greatly reassuring gesture, as she replied, "I am pleased to hear it. I find, however, that my mouth is as dry and parched as if I had traveled a very long way. I believe I would find some Tarkalean tea refreshing upon this occasion. Wouldst thou care for a cup of thine own, my husband?"

His gaze softened at her choice of phrasing. "Indeed, thy offer would be accepted with great gratification, my wife."

After T'Pel had arisen and departed to the food preparation room to brew the tea, Tuvok sat in the darkened meditation chamber alone. Neither of them had bothered to extinguish the lamp-the same lamp that had traveled back from the Delta Quadrant with Tuvok, having been used on so many nights by Kes as well as Tuvok himself; he would be hard-pressed to count them accurately at this late date. The flame of the lamp flickered in the chill air of the chamber. It was night in the desert, in the winter of the year, and the air would feel cool even to those who were not of the Vulcan race. To Tuvok it felt frigid-not that he would be willing to complain about that fact to anyone, even though the beads of sweat that had spread across his face could fairly be cited as the cause of his discomfort.

Truthfully, the quivering sensation that traveled up and down his spine at that moment had less to do with air temperature than it did to the circumstances of what had just occurred. Tuvok had requested his wife's presence during his hours of meditation for the simple reason that he valued her opinions and wanted her to participate fully in the decision he now needed to make. He had no hint that something as momentous as what had just occurred would interfere with their considering all of the pros and cons of the decision-making process.

When T'Pel returned, the tray she carried was graced with another lamp. It shed a considerably brighter light than the meditation lamp did. Alongside the lamp on the tray were an elegant onyx teapot with two matching cups. The teapot had a handle but was otherwise unadorned. The cups were engraved with a series of lines, none of which completely encircled the cup, creating an optical illusion of sorts by the impossibility of their geometry. Tuvok was silent as he contemplated the cups, the teapot, and his wife (not necessarily in that order) while T'Pel poured the tea, which steamed profusely in the cool air of the room. The couple sipped several times before Tuvok advised her, without further prompting, "Not only has that never occurred before; I would not have thought it possible had I not experienced it."

"I confess, Tuvok, that had you told me that this communication had taken place I would have found it difficult to believe, even from you. Because we experienced it together, I have no choice but to believe it-unless it has been a sophisticated hallucination we both perceived at the same time."

The eyes of the couple met. They needed no telepathic touch of the hand or words to convey to each other that this had been no hallucination. It had been nothing less than a true telepathic communication sent across the galaxy from one friend to another.

As one, Tuvok and T'Pel breathed, "Remarkable."

The utterance had nothing to do with the tea.

* * *

**Ocampa:  
Earthdate March 20, 2380 Stardate 56079.9**

As her eyes came back into focus, Kes saw the flame of the lamp flickering before her once again. Her body was rigidly tense, not at all like it had been when she had been instructed in meditation techniques by Tuvok during her days on Voyager. Even when she had made her first frustrating, tentative attempts to expand her consciousness and make contact with Voyager and Tuvok she had not felt this way.

The sudden sensation she was being "watched" during the communication had upset her and caused her to break off the telepathic link. No, upset was an insufficient descriptor. What she had felt was terror-momentary, fragmentary, but there-an emotion she had sought to escape when Captain Janeway had given her the shuttle and given Kes her blessings to flee home to Ocampa.

Unable to remain still any longer, Kes extinguished the flame and began to pace the tiny space in front of her bed, crossing her arms and rubbing her hands roughly over her forearms to quell her feelings of disquiet. The intrusion reminded her of the time she had been assailed by visions from Species 8472, filled with death, destruction, and sheer malice. It was difficult to feel pity for the Borg, it was true, but Kes had felt it then in the face of the Species 8472 onslaught. Even worse, poor Harry Kim had almost been devoured by whatever they had done to him. The Doctor, with the assistance of Kes, had pulled Harry through that crisis, but her days on Voyager had been few after that. She had chosen to leave Voyager, thinking to save her friends from damage as she learned to control her newfound mental abilities and explored the subatomic world of particles and energy shifting between one state and the other.

In retrospect, that choice may have been a mistake. Once she had learned control, she may have helped them travel home to the Alpha Quadrant sooner. Then again, she may have been detrimental to their journey. They'd found their way home at unimaginable speeds (for a starship, at least). Had she been there, perhaps they would never have discovered the mechanism that permitted them to get home. Her attempts to harness her powers may have ended in their destruction, just as she'd feared when she'd chosen to leave.

Maybe it hadn't been a mistake to leave Voyager, no matter how badly it had turned out for Kes herself. A very small being, alone and lost for a very long time, despite her newfound powers she had been very close to being destroyed by a malevolent galaxy many times on her travels. Sometimes now she found it hard to believe she had found her way home, slipping through defensive lines of Krowtonen Guard ships, dodging the Vidiians and the Kazon, avoiding the Haakonians and Trabe, even with the ability to transform herself and her little shuttle, if need be, into a wraith who could slip through the ether at faster-than-warp speeds, escaping those bent upon her capture or destruction and returning to solid form only when she felt she would be safe traveling through normal space.

"Ouch!" Kes cried as she bumped her shin against the desk for the fourth time. She could barely take five steps in any direction before having to reverse direction. In her agitated state, she kept trying to take that sixth step. She laughed ruefully and said aloud to the empty apartment, "Able to leap light years at a thought but unable to remember not to bump into your own furniture! What a wonder you are, Kes! I wonder what the Doctor would say to that? Oh, dear, I wonder if the Doctor ever picked out a name for himself! I miss him so. I miss them all!"

Needing to escape a sudden wave of homesickness for those on Voyager she had once abandoned, Kes moved the curtain aside, stepped away from her bed, and crossed the small room quickly. As she fled through the doorway, Kes made a conscious effort to steady her heartbeat.

Coming into the hydroponic cavern did help, a little. It was strange. She always felt closest to her parents here near the growing plants, as if their spirits still lingered in the familiar haunts where her family had spent so many happy hours together, working for the good of the Ocampan people. Perhaps their spirits really did dwell here, changed by their Morelogiums into non- corporeal beings who had never learned to how to travel back and forth between states, as Kes had. She felt like a little girl again, longing to run into her parents arms for a close hug, to find sanctuary in the warmth of their love.

Kes sighed. Sanctuary. That's what she'd thought she'd find when she returned home, to live out her days, however long they might be, among her own people. In some ways she'd found what she'd been looking for, but in others...

Life here beneath the surface of her home planet was very different from the way it had been when she'd left. Better in some ways. Worse in others. That was always the way of it, she supposed. The one thing she'd never gotten used to was the absence of the one thing she'd climbed to the surface for the first time to find.

She longed to feel the warmth of the sun against her face again, perhaps with a light breeze to tickle her cheek, teasing the strands of her hair into graceful filaments dancing across her forehead. She even wished for bad weather as she'd experienced it on many planets during her journeys. First, the smell of ozone on a freshening wind. Then sluicing rain, or delicate snowflakes, sifting out of leaden gray clouds. Driving particles of icy sleet. Streaks of lightning followed by crashing thunderbolts.

These were her people's birthright, stolen from them by an alien being whose genuine remorse at the damage caused by his mistake could never truly recompense the Ocampa for all they had lost. She knew what weather felt like, but none of the rest of her people did. The Caretaker had offered them sanctuary and survival, caring for them the best way he could; but there was nothing more he could do to help them. He was dead, but the Ocampa were the ones buried beneath the ground. If the Ocampa were to live and thrive as a people, they would have to take their own future in hand and shape it themselves. There was no benevolent being to care for them as his children. It was time for the Ocampa to grow up if they were to survive as individuals and as a people.

It was a cold, cruel universe out there, Kes knew, but those who were willing to stand up for themselves could find friends as well as enemies. She had learned this lesson well, from those who had rescued and sheltered her on Voyager until she had been ready to strike off on her own. The Ocampa simply had to find the courage to look for them. They lacked only a guide-and they did not lack that either, if one who was up to the job was willing to accept it.

Kes made up her mind. Immediately, she knew she had made the right decision. For the first time in a long time she felt truly at peace. Kes' journeys were not done; she had not seen the last of stars and suns.

With a firm, bouncing tread that her friends on Voyager would have recognized with a smile, Kes strode through the cavern towards the home of her friends Tyeris and Benan. Finally, her path was clear. Kes had a task to take up, to complete or die trying. First, however, she had another promise to keep: to visit a set of triplets, to cuddle them and "oo" and "ah" over them and let them know that someday, they, too, would see the sun.

* * *

R_esolving to find a place where her people can settle, Kes undertakes a journey of exploration that takes her to a sector where the inhabitants have suffered a calamity as heartbreaking as the Ocampa's. Will they be willing to share a world they know their own people do not need in exchange for the chance to find the peace and stability they must have to solve their problems?_

_All they need, perhaps, are "Altruistic Motives."_


	3. Altruistic Motives Part 1

**Altruistic Motives  
****Written by Janet, Christina, and Rocky  
****Story by Janet, Christina, Penny, and the Season 7.5 staff****  
**

_Summary: Kes undertakes a mission to find a new home for the Ocampa where they can thrive beneath the sun. On her journey she enlists the help of some old friends, including Dr. Denara Pel of Vidiia, where the cure for the Phage has created as many problems as it has solved._

_Spoilers: Many episodes, but especially "Cold Fire" and "Fury"_

_Dedicated to all the space explorers, those who have returned safely home as well as those who sacrificed their lives helping mankind reach for the stars._

_Author's Note (jamelia): This story was planned in the summer of 2002 and has its genesis even further back, during Voyager's season 6. When we developed VV7.5 we discussed whether or not "Fury" would be considered part of our canon or not. We finally decided the split would occur after "Shattered," which meant that "Fury" was (regrettably) part of our series history and cried out for the VV7.5 "we feel the need for a fix" treatment (all events of "Fury" are assumed to have occurred)._

* * *

**Prologue:**

_**Stardate 56271.2-April 8, 2380**_

_**Ocampan homeworld**_

"Please, Kes. Let me come with you."

Kes stopped midway up the stairs to the next landing, taking advantage of the chance to take a "breather" from their laborious climb up the stairs to the surface. "I appreciate your offer, Josan, but I'll be fine, really."

"It might be a good idea for someone to accompany you, Kes. If you become ill or..." Council member Vertris hesitated, clearly reluctant to give Kes reasons. Vertris didn't need to; Kes knew what she was trying hard not to say.

"You're afraid my Morelogium will occur en route?"

"Well, it's always a possibility," Vertris replied.

"You don't need to worry about that," Kes said, shrugging her shoulders carelessly. Vertris was trying to assure the success of the mission. It was her job to raise concerns, even if the Ocampan Ruling Council had previously aired them. Kes had answered them well enough to gain the council's somewhat reluctant consent to travel alone. Kes didn't see why she should go over it all again now.

Kes would not change her mind now, Vertris knew that. Kes suspected she was "covering her back," as Harry Kim sometimes said (Tom Paris had used a more colorful variant), preparing for questions from the council should the mission go awry. ("I tried to stop her from going alone, but Kes wouldn't listen. Lyrial and Josan, you heard her...")

A quick glance in her friends' direction changed Kes' mind about addressing the issue again. Lyrial and Josan had also been vocal about the dangers of traveling by herself. Kes reminded them that she had journeyed alone in a shuttle all the way back to Ocampa had not assuaged their fears for the safety of the woman they called "Auntie" in private. Kes never had anticipated finding strangers on Ocampa who would become family to her, but she should not have been surprised. It was, after all, what happened when people married and gained new "in-law" family members. And it wasn't the first time Kes had seen it happen on a much larger scale.

Lyrial and Josan's generosity of spirit reminded Kes of how the people of Voyager had enclosed Kes and Neelix within the family ties Captain Janeway and her crew formed after the Caretaker had pulled them immeasurably far from the ones waiting in the Alpha Quadrant. The crew comforted and supported each other as they adjusted to new lives in the Delta Quadrant, teaching Kes that the warmth of family did not need to be of blood to become a vital part of a person's existence. After she exiled herself from Voyager, she apparently forgot that lesson.

In the same way, Lyrial and Josan had become much more than friends to Kes in the months since she returned to Ocampa. The young couple shared their small cubbyhole of an apartment with her, providing Kes with a family circle, something which Kes had already lost by the time she chose all those years ago to climb to the surface of Ocampa to "see the sun" for herself. By letting Lyrial and Josan "adopt" her, Kes had turned them into her relatives, too. As such, they deserved far more than a cursory, "Don't worry about me," before she left them, possibly for the last time. She was confident she would be successful, but who knew what might happen to prevent her from meeting Lyrial and Josan again? Bitter experience had taught Kes just how uncertain life could be.

Turning to the couple, Kes caught a hand from each of them and gave them a gentle but emphatic squeeze. "Please, trust in your 'Auntie Kes.' Everything will turn out all right. I know you want to protect me, but you don't need to worry. I've taken on this task of my own free will, and it _*will*_ be completed successfully. The Morelogium will not be a factor, I'm sure. Truthfully, I'm concerned Josan would miss your Elogium if he travels with me. It will be here very soon now!"

"How can you be so sure, Kes?" Lyrial asked plaintively.

"About my Morelogium, or your Elogium?" Kes responded with a wink. Since Lyrial did not respond to Kes' gentle teasing with a smile, as Kes had hoped, she continued in a more serious vein. " I don't want you to miss out on the chance to become a mother, as I did, Lyrial, because I had no mate near me when the time of my Elogium finally came."

Lyrial's face flamed with embarrassment, but she whispered. "We both could come."

Kes replied gently, "We've already discussed that. There isn't room in this shuttle for three people to occupy it for an extended amount of time. It's even smaller than our apartment!"

Lyrial did smile at that, but Vertris had grown impatient with this diversion from her own agenda. "The status of Lyrial and Josan's family life is not the issue here. Kes, we all know your Morelogium cannot be far in the future now. If you should die on the journey, all alone, the Council..."

"The Council did not seem all that worried about losing me to the Morelogium when they tabled my proposal for over a week, Vertris," Kes stated severely, but she quickly regretted her rigid stance when Vertris flinched visibly.

Even before Kes' return Vertris begged the council to hollow out more habitable areas beneath the surface of the planet. The others had been too short-sighted to listen to her. She was the one to present Kes' plan to search for a new home for the Ocampa to the Council, arguing that food would eventually run out, as comfortable dwellings had, if something was not done to increase, or at the very least, replenish, the dwindling supplies of energy in storage. Vertris, of all the council members, did not deserve Kes' scorn.

Kes patted the council representative on the forearm and continued, in a more placating manner, "I know that delay wasn't your fault, Vertris. You tried to make them see the merits of my suggestion right away. But I'll be fine. I'm sure of it."

Kes briefly considered whether she should confess why she was so sure the Morelogium would not be a factor. Kes actually went through it years ago, when she left Voyager for the first time. It was then the great secret had been revealed to her. The Morelogium was not really a death. A way back existed for one who knew the techniques for shifting in and out of a corporeal form of life and felt she still had "unfinished business" on this plane of existence.

Almost as soon as she thought about mentioning it, Kes dismissed the idea. Vertris and her young friends Lyrial and Josan were not yet ready for that knowledge. Turning away from her friends, Kes leaned against the handrail, surreptitiously probing the strength of the supports and wall fastenings of the stairway. This set of steps had been the least damaged from the Caretaker's final barrage, sealing the entrances to the Ocampa's subterranean hideaway ten years ago. It had been repaired and maintained by her people ever since as the only safe route to the surface. Kes wanted to make sure the way was still sound. It would be terrible if it failed when her friends were on their way back down to the caverns. They would surely perish after such a fall.

Once reassured the stairway and railing were sound, Kes resumed her upward climb, only to be interrupted by Josan. "What if you become ill or incapacitated?".

Kes glanced back over her shoulder at him but didn't stop climbing. "I thought we'd already settled this, Josan. If I were incapacitated, would you be able to pilot the shuttle back here? It took me three years to learn how to fly one properly, and I took lessons from one of the very best pilots in Starfleet. I'm afraid I couldn't do half as good a job teaching you as Tom did, even if I had twice the time. And if I did pass away, stranding you somewhere out in space wouldn't help our people. I'm sure I'll be fine, but even if I'm not and I can't return, our people won't be any worse off than before I came home last year."

"We would be far better off, thanks to the technologies you brought back with you. Finding out how to use paragithium to stretch our power resources has been a blessing," Vertris agreed. "Still, you can't blame us for feeling a bit nervous, Kes. we would be heart-broken never to see you again. And you've raised hopes that the Ocampa will see the sun and stars again!"

"It will happen! I'm sure of it! I just have to do it my own way." Kes smiled.

Vertris nodded her head. "That was always your way, if the stories about 'Kes the Adventuress' are even half true."

Kes' throaty laugh echoed in the stairwell. Tales of Kes' leaving Ocampa with her friends from the other side of the galaxy had become legendary in the years before her miraculous, unexpected return. She couldn't very well deny that!

Reaching the next landing she waited for her friends, who gathered around her. "I'm confident of success. I wish I could tell you why, but I am. Just have faith!"

Vertris, Josan, and Lyrial could not totally erase the signs of worry from their faces, but they had no alternative. Each gave her a hug in turn, letting her know they had accepted Kes' decision.

The rest of the ascent passed quickly, ending where the shuttle from Voyager was hidden, wedged within pores of the rock. Only because of Kes' ability to transform herself and the shuttle between corporeal and non-corporeal form could it be freed from its hiding place to fly again between the stars.

After all they'd discussed on the climb up, their farewells were brief, which Kes preferred. Quickly, before the good-byes could turn maudlin, Kes expanded into a fog that seeped between the molecules of the shuttle's rocky hanger. Slipping inside the shuttle, she rearranged her subatomic particles back into her usual solid form and prepared the small craft for take off.

At last the shuttle "Benaren" lifted off, disguised as a dust devil to fool any scavengers who might mark its rise, and disappeared into the night sky. After achieving orbit above the world within which she had born, Kes caught a quick glimpse of Ocampa's sun. As she aimed her craft towards the outer reaches of the system, she whispered a fervent prayer to all her forebears to help her make her promise a reality. Kes would find another home for the Ocampa, one where they could live the lives they deserved, or die in the attempt. She could not bear the alternative: the Ocampa people, huddling inside overcrowded warrens-turned-mausoleums, slowly dying off as their resources were exhausted. Kes refused to accept that fate for her people.

* * *

**ACT 1:**

_**Stardate 56271.8-April 8, 2380**_

_**outside the Ocampa system**_

Although Kes had successfully convinced Vertris, Josan, and Lyrial she'd be better off if she didn't have to worry about anyone else riding with her in her shuttle, she didn't expect to be alone in space for long either. Her expectation was quickly fulfilled. Within two hours of leaving orbit around the planet of her birth and bidding the dusty brown world farewell, her comm crackled with the command to "Cease forward motion and prepare to be boarded!"

The ship which hove suddenly into view bristled with projections on its hull, clearly a formidable weapons array. The ugly ship was so large, Kes was sure few flying vessels the size of hers would have the temerity to disobey.

Of course, none of those vessels were piloted by Kes of the Ocampa, once a member of the Federation starship Voyager. She'd learned a thing or two from her time with Captain Kathryn Janeway. One of these was "talk when you can to buy time." Another was, "Don't back down in front of bullies; they'll never leave you alone if you do."

Kes opened the channel. "My name is Kes, a representative of the Ocampan people. I have no intention of doing anything to harm you or..."

Kes knew they were going to attack several seconds before a blaze of light reached out of their ship. The light arrived; the blast of their weapons did not. Using all her considerable mental strength, Kes bent the energy from the blast back against the shields of the attacking ship, shoving it in the opposite direction and out of sight. Kes gathered herself together and mentally 'pushed' her little shuttle not quite three light years in the direction she had sent her attacker.

A few seconds later she saw the craft hanging motionless in space before her, silhouetted against a brightly glowing yellow star. Several of the ugly projections from the port side had been sheared away. The ship must have had a too-close encounter with some sort of planetary body during its unexpected trip in reverse and looked a good deal less threatening now.

Kes opened a channel to the ship again, this time forcing the controls of the opposing ship to send back a visual of its bridge.

She couldn't keep a vaguely predatory smile from her lips. As efficient as a ship's inertial dampers were in protecting its crew from being harmed whenever the unimaginable speeds it traveled increased or decreased abruptly, there was always that initial microsecond before they flared into action. Kes had learned on Voyager that was just enough time for the residual inertia to bounce her away from her duty station, off her feet, or, if she were fortunate enough to be sitting at the time, to grab onto her seat and hang on for dear life.

The dampers on this ship worked the same way Voyager's had. Through the view screen, Kes watched as several heads popped into view at irregular intervals, hands rubbing against them as though to check if those all-important humanoid appendages were still fastened firmly onto their necks.

Kes engaged her comm once again. "Unidentified vessel, if your species is subject to danger from head injuries, I suggest you seek medical attention if you feel at all dizzy or lost consciousness..."

"How dare you attack us!" called out a voice from the face which swam into the central viewing area of the screen.

"Not an 'attack,' a defensive action," Kes corrected sternly. "I did nothing more than deflect the energy beam you directed at _*my*_ shuttle back at you. Why did you shoot at me? My little ship clearly would be no threat to yours!"

"The damage to our ship says otherwise!" the alien growled.

"You have only yourselves to blame if your aggressive actions cause damage to your own ship. You don't have to bother getting your weapons systems back on line immediately. I'd concentrate on fixing your drive and your protective shielding if I were you. I have no plans to retaliate unless you fire on me again, and I wouldn't recommend it. If there is another attack, I'll gladly shove your ship back through that star, and in their present state, I don't believe your shields could prevent your hull from burning away before you came through the other side."

Orange eyes gleamed fiercely in the light green face staring back at her. He grunted as he glanced down at his instruments. She knew the tale they told. This crew had several hours of repair work to complete, at the very least, before they could endanger her again-if they were so foolish as to try again after the demonstration she'd just given them.

As he made no further effort to speak with her but did not attempt to cut off communications, Kes made a few quick adjustments to her sensors and confirmed that the colors of his face were being accurately conveyed to her. "You are of the race known as the Krowtonan Guard?" she asked.

"We are! And you are trespassing within the borders of our space," he declaimed in an imperious tone.

That fit in with the little she'd heard of the Guard. She'd never seen them face to face before but had heard they had green skin. Neelix had described them as nasty types who usually shot first and asked questions later. She should probably be grateful they chose to demand her compliance before attacking; it had given her enough time to sense their intentions. At the moment, however, Kes wasn't in a particularly forgiving mood. She was about to say so when she noted several beings in the background who were of a race Kes had encountered in the past.

"You have Haakonians traveling with you?" Kes inquired.

The alien froze so briefly it might be barely detectable to most. Kes caught it and knew that whatever he said next, he would be dissembling.

"You must be mistaken. Only the Krowtonan Guard travel on this ship."

"I can see two Haakonians clearly, standing next to one another and behind your left shoulder," Kes persisted.

The scope of the visual transmission shrank until only the face of the Guard to whom she was speaking was completely visible. Even so, one Haakonian had to step away to the right to prevent his forehead from remaining in view.

Kes laughed. "Keep your secrets, then. I'll find out what I need to know about the Haakonians and the Krowtonan Guard elsewhere, if that's the way you want it, although I doubt others will describe you to me the way you would."

The Guard officer grunted but declined to say anything to Kes.

"Then may I ask you a few questions about other races in this sector? What is happening among the Kazon sects, the Talaxians, the Trabe, and the Vidiians?"

Apparently gossiping about other races was not quite as threatening to the Krowtonan Guard as direct questions about themselves. After turning away and mumbling to someone now out of sight, he began to lecture stiffly, as if to a lesser officer he didn't much care for.

"Several Kazon sects are active in this area. They are as vicious and as disorganized as ever, but you would be well advised to avoid them just the same. Vidiian vessels have been seen, but rarely. There have not been any confirmed attacks by Vidiians on other vessels for the past four years. The Trabe have not been seen for the past two years, although rumors abound they are in hiding, waiting for chances to strike the unwary. The Haakonian Protectorate continues to provide for the defense of Talax. Several vessels have disappeared near Talax under mysterious circumstances in the last few years, however. You would be wise not to travel in that direction. Two derelict Borg vessels were found recently, apparently abandoned and filled only with corpses of drones. No living Borg has been active in this vicinity in over a year. I have answered your questions. Is there anything more you require?"

His frosty tone made it perfectly clear he'd already supplied more than he wanted to share with Kes. While she would have liked to learn much more, she decided not to waste any more time asking him about a planet for the Ocampa. Besides, it was obvious the Krowtonan Guard and/or the Haakonians would "protect" any planet settled in this vicinity. The Ocampa had already been "protected" in that sense of the word almost to extinction. As graciously as she could, Kes answered, "No. You've been very helpful."

As she leaned over break contact, the Krowtonan Guardsman surprised her. "Kes of the Ocampan people, I warn you: be vigilant when strange vessels are sighted, as we are! They are more likely to be enemies than friends."

So that was how they justified their behavior, Kes mused, although, considering those in the immediate neighborhood, the advice might be warranted. Rather than trying to push him into any further disclosures, Kes said, "Thanks again for your advice. Now, do you need any help to repair your ship, Captain...?"

"NO!" the Krowtonan Guard yelled, declining to give his name.

"I'll be leaving then, Captain. Thanks again for the information." Kes smiled at him sweetly, then cut the transmission abruptly. Closing her eyes, Kes concentrated upon herself and her shuttle, her awareness slipping down to the subatomic level where it must be for her to "play," as she thought of it, when she shifted from one state to another.

Kes' smile disappeared like the Cheshire Cat's in a book she'd read once on Voyager as her shuttle melted around her and she turned into a being of energy and light. She could imagine the Krowtonan Guard and their shadowy Haakonian compatriots/allies falling all over themselves in consternation at her sudden disappearance, trying to figure out what sort of drive she was using to create that particular visual effect.

"Let them puzzle over that a good long time," she thought smugly as she headed out into the dangerous region of space in which she found herself, one which Kes and the Ocampa could leave soon for a safer area-she hoped.


	4. Altruistic Motives Part 2

_**Stardate 56333.5-May 4, 2380**_

_**ShahKar, Vulcan**_

As soon as she entered the room, T'Pel knew her husband had made up his mind. She did not need telepathy to know this.

After almost seven decades together as bonded mates, Tuvok's body language had become imprinted within her soul. She was as familiar with it as she was the sound of his voice echoing in the hallway or the brush of his mind against hers in a meld. When Starfleet had informed her that the ship which had carried her husband into the Badlands had been declared lost, the prospect of never seeing or hearing or feeling ever again had drained her of all emotion. Ironically, this admittedly emotional response to tragedy had brought her to the state which all Vulcans seek. After the memorial service which formally established T'Pel's widowhood, she meditated daily, but it was by force of habit. She never controlled her emotions for the simple reason she had none. She was numb.

Then the numbness faded, and T'Pel perceived a tenuous yet familiar vibration in her soul whenever she meditated. She consulted with experts in such matters. Most observed that the telepathic bond which linked husband and wife was still present; they continued to be among the parted, but never parted. Most added that it was an interesting phenomenon but meant nothing. Some, however, most notably T'Verren at the temple on Mount Seleya, assured T'Pel that if her husband were truly dead, their link would have decayed by then. From then on, T'Pel had to double and redouble her efforts to control her emotions, for one constantly asserted itself. Hope.

T'Pel was certain her husband lived on somewhere, though she did not know whether she would ever see him again. She did what she could to find out what may have happened, even traveling to Deep Space Nine once to speak to personnel there who had traveled the Badlands or slipped into the Mirror Universe. From that visit, T'Pel had formed the hypothesis that the Maquis ship and Voyager had somehow become entangled within the Mirror Universe. Since others had escaped, perhaps her husband could do the same.

The details of her hypothesis had been erroneous, but hope had been fulfilled despite it. He had returned to her, and she could again observe his body language, hear his voice, and touch his mind in actual fact and not only memory.

This morning Tuvok sat hunched forward in the chair, almost as if he were about to launch himself from it; from the calm expression upon his face and the state of relaxation of his hands steepled together but resting upon his lap, she knew he intended no such thing. As if that were not enough of a clue, she noted Tuvok had lit the candles in the wall sconces of the meditation chamber but not the meditation lamp itself. The time for concentrating on the flame and considering his options had passed. Tuvok had come to a decision, and he was about to share it with her.

Since only one question had dominated her husband's thoughts for the past several weeks, she also knew which decision he must have made. The one thing she could not tell from his stance was whether the decision which had been reached was, "Stay" or "Leave."

"T'Pel, please be seated."

She sat, of course, taking the seat facing his. The light from the sconces flickered over Tuvok's skin, highlighting the noble contours and reflecting sparks of fire from the depths of his rich brown eyes. For several seconds they remained as immobile as ancient images carved out of rich warm wood in the days before Surak.

She wanted him to speak first, but this particular decision was too important to their family and had taken too long to be made for T'Pel to be able to hold her tongue as long as she needed. "I await your words, husband."

Even then Tuvok hesitated, taking a very deep breath before saying, "I have decided to resign my Starfleet commission."

Because of his struggle over making this decision, she had halfway expected this result, but she was surprised by her own reaction to his announcement. "Are you certain this is the path you wish to take? You left Starfleet once before..."

"I am certain." He raised a quizzical eyebrow. "You sound displeased. I had thought you would look forward to my spending more time with our family on Vulcan."

"I do look forward to spending more time with you. Our children, however, have reached the stage of life in which they are occupied in creating their own lives. They are much less at home now as a consequence, and... " Her voice died away in mid-sentence.

"Yes? What else?" Tuvok asked somewhat gruffly, when her hesitation lasted beyond a few seconds.

"I cannot forget you left Starfleet once before, yet later, you came to have doubts as to the wisdom of that decision."

Tuvok opened his mouth to reply but, in his turn, hesitated. He could not deny T'Pel's observation. Finally, he said, "While this may be true, I have had the opportunity since then to return and achieve the goals I once set for myself. I have never had the desire to obtain command of a Starfleet vessel of my own. Any questions I may have asked myself about this subject were fully answered when I assumed command after we were forced to... abandon Captain Janeway and Chakotay upon the planet they called New Earth."

"It was an unpleasant experience."

Tuvok stood up and began to pace, his hands clasped behind his back. "Having the crew question my decision to accept Captain Janeway's express orders to assume command and continue the journey home to the Federation, avoiding the Vidiians at all cost? It was unpleasant, granted. Yet it was also to be expected, since the non-Vulcan members of the crew had extremely volatile natures. I dealt with it adequately."

"By agreeing to their demand to contact the Vidiians, if I recall correctly? Yes, that dealt with the problem quite well," T'Pel stated calmly, with a hint of skepticism. "However, it was not your commanding Voyager to which I was referring as being the 'unpleasant experience,' but rather that you were forced to leave your friend and commanding officer Kathryn Janeway behind, expecting never to see her or Commander Chakotay again."

Tuvok came to an abrupt halt in mid-stride. His left foot stumbled slightly upon a minute irregularity of the flagstone flooring as he faced T'Pel. Despite his need to suppress a sudden surge of guilt that assailed him at the reminder of that experience, he could not help noticing how beautifully her skin was highlighted by the glow of afternoon sunlight flowing from the far window onto her face.

"Yes, it was unpleasant," he admitted. "It cannot compare to another time, however, when I was stranded away from Voyager for what Lieutenant Paris and I thought were many months; when we thought Voyager, thinking us lost, had left us behind. I thought I would never return to Vulcan to see you again."

T'Pel rose to her feet. Wordlessly, she extended her fingers to him. He accepted her offering, stroking them gently. No off-worlder could ever know just how intensely their bond was expressed by the simple exchanging of the sense of touch; but, of course, none were present to see at that moment.

When Tuvok would have dropped his hand to his side, T'Pel clasped it between both of hers and said huskily, "Bitter were the years before we received word your vessel survived, although far away. I did not lose faith that you still lived, for I sensed our bond too deeply for you to have been lost forever, but I must confess, I awoke many times wondering how many nights I would sleep alone before you returned to my side."

"Then you understand why I refuse to risk another parting such as that?"

T'Pel sighed heavily. "I do, for I also would not care to experience another separation like it. In the future, however, Starfleet Command could reverse the decision not to accept my application to serve them as a civilian. Perhaps we could wait a little longer to notify them of your intention to resign."

"In such a case, I am sure they would consider accepting me back to active duty. They did once before, despite the many years I was away, as you noted only a few minutes ago."

Her lips quivered slightly as she raised her right eyebrow. "They did indeed. I trust they would have the good sense to so once again."

Slowly, Tuvok raised his free hand to his wife's face, tracing the line of demarcation between shadow and sunlight on his wife's cheek, as he contemplated once again the merits of the matrimonial state.

* * *

_**Stardate 56349.4 May 6, 2380**_

_**Horspant District offices, Vidalia, Vidiia**_

"Ah, Dr. Pel, how good of you to meet with me," Councilor-Delegate Quentan Drin of the Horspant District said with a motion that indicated she should sit.

Denara took the offered seat. "Thank you for the invitation." She place a packet of documents on the Councilor-Delegate's desk. "I have brought my research results." She waited a second before realizing he wasn't going to look at them. "We have had excellent success with Derogasta Prenikolium combined with..."

"Denara...Dr. Pel, I am familiar with your excellent research into post-Phage treatments," Drin said. "I have been your strongest advocate here in the Sodality. But the realities of-" he hesitated a second, "-the present economic downturn are that we need to sacrifice-"

She closed her eyes at the word sacrifice. Drin continued speaking the words she'd spent many sleepless night worrying about. "-We're going to have to make significant cuts in the National Budget." He hesitated. "Unfortunately we are cutting funding to almost all research projects, including yours."

"Sir, you can't. Our people NEED the treatment. And we have to continue our research into...that other problem." She knew that Drin was a prude and mentioning the infertility problems of well over fifty percent of the population would _*embarrass*_ him.

He still stuttered his response. "I'm sorry, Dr. Pel. I will continue to try to find funds for all your research. Several corporations are interested in providing funding for worthwhile research."

She grimaced. She'd wanted to avoid corporate funding. Her research was for the good of the people-and she wondered if a corporation would understand that.

"Times are hard, as I know you are well aware. The Antiphagia found by our scientists freed our people from worry about the Phage-but with the increased survival rate, came an increasing unemployment rate."

"Don't give me that," Denara said with a snarl. "The economy was in ruins long before the Antiphagia was found."

Drin nodded. "I'm sorry Denara, I wish I could do something." He smiled suddenly. "Perhaps I can. Mupano Industries has recently shown an interest in stepping in to provide funding for worth while research projects. I can write a letter of introduction before I retire."

"That would be appreciated," Denara said. She tried to sound enthusiastic, but the look on Drin's face suggested she hadn't succeeded. "Thank you."

"Denara..."

"I need to return to my clinic, sir." She stood, trying not to cry. "Counselor Drin, I appreciate everything you've done for me..."

"Denara..." She was out the door before he finished. She swore silently to the many gods-she didn't really care which one heard her. Or perhaps she wanted them all to hear.

"Damn them all. They're dooming our people!"

* * *

**Act 2:**

_**Stardate 56695.4-September 8, 2380**_

_**Nekrit Supply Depot**_

When she first left Ocampa, Kes took a similar heading to the one Voyager did when leaving her home planet ten years ago. The people of Voyager hadn't been looking for a place to settle; they'd been looking for the way home. Kes thought she remembered a few places they had passed by that had been uninhabited. Perhaps one of them would prove to be the sanctuary she sought.

It had taken Voyager's crew more than two years to reach the supply depot at the edge of the Nekrit Expanse. Kes managed to get there in five months, despite making several stops along the way to investigate the planets she thought might be possibilities.

It would have taken Voyager less than a year if the ship could have taken a straight course, without running into any trouble along the way from various aggressors like the Kazon and the Vidiians. Instead, Captain Janeway's crew had been forced to take a more meandering course, looking to replenish scarce energy and food supplies along the way. The extent of Kes' food foraging was ordering meals whenever she stopped at an inhabited planet. Her original supplies of food from home that she ate on her shuttle were still not exhausted (although the choices were becoming more limited and therefore somewhat boring to eat).

Kes' travel time was also markedly reduced because she gave her little shuttle a "push" for a few seconds from time to time. The distance a conventional warp drive craft would need a week or more to traverse, Kes traveled in a few minutes after one of her "pushes," but she couldn't keep that pace up for long. For every "push" lasting more than a few seconds at her personal "Warp 9.99999," Kes was limp and weak for the next several hours. This was acceptable during her search, since she needed to complete it in a reasonable length of time, but once she reached the Nekrit Supply Depot, she knew she had reached the practical limits for a move for her people. Kes needed to find a planet within reach of Ocampa, not one so far away there was no practical way to transport her people.

Even getting as far as the Nekrit Expanse might be impossible, and once she arrived, whispers about aggressive peoples like the Voth and the Srivani who would be encountered further ahead abounded amongst those she met at the Nekrit Supply Depot. Information in her shuttle's data banks, as well as what Kes remembered, confirmed her feeling that it was impractical to search further this way. It looked like Kes would have to turn back to investigate possibilities in another direction she and Voyager head never explored. After three months of almost constant travel, Kes had identified only one possibility, and that seemed a remote one. Kes was very unsure she should recommend it to her people.

Voyager's crew had been invited to settle on the planet of the "37's," as Captain Janeway had called it, but one hundred fifty or so members of a starship crew are a far cry from well over a million refugee Ocampans. The Boirii had not seemed quite as welcoming to Kes as she had expected from the way they'd greeted Voyager's crew. The planet itself, an "L" type, had a much more rigorous climate than she'd remembered as well. The truly habitable areas of the globe were quite limited. The sections identified as possible sites for Ocampan settlements were extremely dry, alarmingly similar to the barren deserts covering the surface of her native planet. Kes had grave doubts concerning its acceptability to her people; they would not be enticed easily to move to another dry planet, even if they were completely welcome by those who already lived there.

While pondering whether to strike out in a completely different direction immediately or return home to Ocampa to report on what she'd found out so far, when she had a chance encounter. Walking down the restaurant corridor of the supply depot, Kes had to dodge a large reptilian who possessed a tail with an apparent life of its own, slashing from side to side vigorously. She didn't quite manage it, tripped, and crashed into the Talaxian who was making his own valiant attempt to avoid stomping on the errant appendage. The tail had beaten them both.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" Kes said, helping the hapless Talaxian up from the pavement.

"The fault is completely mine, lovely lady. Please accept my sincere apologies. Allow me to purchase some refreshments for you, to atone for my error. Captain Jixtan of the Talaxian freighter _Victorious Morning_ is my name. And you are?"

"My name is Kes, " she replied, noting the Talaxian captain's resemblance to Wixiban, the "old friend" of Neelix's who led him astray on this very station. She certainly hoped he was more trustworthy than Wix had been. Regardless of his morals, Captain Jixtan obviously wasn't averse to flattering an old woman. "You don't have to get me anything. I'm fine. But are you all right? I happen to have medical training, and I am well-versed in Talaxian physiology."

"I feel fine... but perhaps it would be a good idea if you observe me for a short while-medical observations only, of course-that small beverage and snack shop over there looks like an excellent place for that. Please, come over with me."

Almost before she realized it, Kes found herself seated at a small table while an obviously healthy Captain Jixtan fetched her the cup of herb tea she'd finally agreed he could buy for her. She laughed at herself. Her own reasons for accepting his offer were as transparent as his to her. After enduring so much solitude for the past few months, she found the prospect of conversing with a familiar sort of face very appealing, even if Captain Jixtan was a stranger.

While Jixtan waited in the long line to be served, peeking over his shoulder from time to time to flutter his fingers at Kes, she relaxed at the table, enjoying the parade of alien beings passing by. Many belonged to races she recognized, but even more did not. The Nekrit Expanse truly was a very long way from her home. How overwhelming it must have been in those early days for the crew of Voyager, faced with a journey ten times as long!

"Here you are," Captain Jixtan said, placing a tray before her with a flourish. The pot of herb tea next to two stacking mugs were accompanied by a small plate (not ordered by Kes) of dainty pastries, of a type that Neelix used to make. They brought her former lover to mind again. A little misty-eyed from nostalgia, she accepted one of the cakes without comment. Jixtan sipped his own tea and nibbled on a cake, sharing the moment in respectful silence.

When he spoke again, Captain Jixtan reminded Kes even more of Neelix. "You look like you lost your best friend. Is there any way I might be of help?"

She smiled at him gratefully. "Sparing a little of your time right now to spend with an old woman like me is a great help. Thank you so much. How's your foot doing? I really am sorry I stepped on it."

"Oh, it's just fine. I think you stepped harder on that Valyrian's tail, and I don't think she even noticed." He took another sip of tea. "Well, now. You're certainly a fair way from home. Where are you bound? Are you just starting out, or are you heading back home to the station?"

Kes hesitated a moment, a little confused. Then she understood. Captain Jixtan thought she was one of the Ocampa from Suspiria's station, as he logically would. Even the Ocampans on the station had been surprised when Kes arrived there with Voyager. She considering whether or not it would be easier to let him think she was from the Ocampan station, but honesty won out. "Actually, I'm not from the Ocampan Space Station, although I understand why you would think that. I visited it once, about eight years ago."

Jixtan raised his brows. "But if you're not from the station, where are you from?"

"From the Ocampan homeworld, not far from Talax."

"Really? That's fascinating!" the captain exclaimed. "I had no idea any Ocampa still lived on that planet."

"Not on, within. We live underground."

"Well, what do you think of that? Most people I know believe the story about the Ocampa moving underground is just a legend. And after that last bombardment from the Array, before it was destroyed by the Kazon, I would have thought if any Ocampa were still hiding out somehow, they would have been killed."

"The Ocampa retreat underground is not a legend. The barrage from the Array was meant to seal us in, away from predators like the Kazon, but now we need to find a new home. We're running out of room..."

Captain Jixtan was a good listener. Kes found herself spilling out her impressions about the various planets she'd passed on the way, asking him to add anything he might know about them, to obtain a second opinion to add to her own perceptions. She remained deliberately vague about the dates and details of her arrivals and departures, however, implying that she'd left Ocampa several months earlier than she really did. Captain Jixtan seemed very nice, but he didn't need to know about the speeds she could move her little shuttle when she had the energy to do it. She also decided not to discuss the Briorii, curious if he would bring them up himself as a possibility.

"The Myleans are under the hegemony of the Haakonians, I hear."

"Yes, they are. The Talaxians are still ruled by them, too," Captain Jixtan sadly confirmed. "And you know about the Krowtonan Guards, of course?"

"Are the Krowtonan Guards ruled by the Haakonians?" Kes asked with some surprise.

"Oh, yes. They claim to be 'allies' rather than subject people, but there's always at least two Haakonian officers on every Guard ship. You don't find a Krowtonan Guard officer on every Haakonian ship, I can tell you that."

Kes filed this information away to consider further, then continued her litany. "The Baneans and Numari are still fighting each other and it wouldn't be safe to settle there. The Mithrens and Rukani were very pleasant and hospitable towards me, but both claim to have massive problems with overpopulation and can't possibly help. No room for the Ocampa on any of their planets."

"I think there's some truth to what the Rukani told you, Kes, but the Mithrens aren't all that crowded on their planets."

"We wouldn't be welcome there, that's clear. Let me see, who else have I met? Oh, yes. The Sikarians. They were coldly polite. They made their reluctance to have any personal contact with me very obvious. I'm from a 'primitive society that has little to offer in the way of compensation' for any land graciously given to us by the Sikarians. I left them without any regrets; they'd make for intolerable neighbors anyway."

Captain Jixtan laughingly confirmed that the less one saw of the Sikarians, the better.

"I found out the Sikarians claim Irixios, too, so that was another planet I had to cross off my list. Then I tried to visit the Drayans, but they're as xenophobic as ever. If there are planets where the Ocampa could settle in their space, I'll never find them. They denied me permission to travel through their space."

"I'm not surprised. They had an unfortunate experience with a ship traveling from the other side of the galaxy several years ago, I hear. They claim their religious beliefs were violated and want even less to do with the rest of us than they did before-and it wasn't much back then. I'm surprised they were even willing to talk with you. They were heavily veiled, I suppose, even though they were talking over your communication device?"

"Yes, they were all veiled." Kes decided on the spot it would be wiser not to mention anything about stopping to forage for food on uninhabited planets while with Voyager. Fortunately, she'd obscured the markings on the shuttle that identified it as a Federation craft.

After a slight hesitation, she decided she could say, "I know there are quite a few planets I've, uh... heard about that are uninhabited now, but they're owned by one race or another. Perhaps a small group of a few thousand or so people could hide out on one for a while and be overlooked, but it would be dangerous to do it without having a strong defense force for protection. If the possessor of one of those planets found out and decided to displace us forcibly, we Ocampa would have more problems than we have now. And we have a lot more than a few thousand to move to a new home. Think how many planets we'd have to sneak onto in order for everyone to have a home! That's no way to live. No wonder the Trabe are so bitter. They've had to retreat to their own vessels for a long time, fated to wander from star to star, because they don't have a homeland."

Captain Jixtan leaned back, shaking his head. "You're right about the Trabe. It has been a struggle for them, but they aren't entirely blameless, you know."

Kes smiled. "I know there's always two sides to every story. And I guess I learned the hard way it isn't so easy finding another home. I wish it were otherwise."

"I do, too. You've had quite an amazing journey! I wish I knew of a place to recommend, but you seem to have looked into the ones I thought might be available. I didn't even know Irixios was claimed by the Sikarians! It's too bad so many planets are claimed by races that have the power to hold them without really needing the planet, at least, not now. But wait-the Vidiians-you didn't mention them. If you have the right thing to offer them, they might be willing to come to an agreement over one of their uninhabited planets. They have so many!"

Kes shuddered. "Not the Vidiians! I don't want my people to become stockpiled body parts!"

"Oh, they don't steal body parts any more. Didn't you hear? Word is they found a cure for the Phage."

"I heard about it, but I didn't know if I should really believe it," Kes said, skepticism evident in her tone of voice.

"It certainly seems to be true. Except for the occasional trade ship, the Vidiians are hardly seen around the sector now. It's almost as if they've gone into hiding. Your reaction to them is fairly typical, so it might be they're lying low for a while, until resentment towards them for what they did to survive fades a little. Most people do forget, in time. Except the Drayans, maybe."

"I should think the Vidiians would want to keep out of the way for a while. I knew people who lost their lives to them."

"Many others say the same." Captain Jixtan smoothed his whiskers down in a gesture Neelix always used to do, making Kes feel even more nostalgic for her old boyfriend.

"You said you only visited the Ocampan space station once, over eight years ago. Why not go back there now? Maybe they could help your search-although, come to think of it, I'm sure they would never have moved their station there if they'd had any choice in the matter."

"They moved the station away from where it was?" Kes asked, wondering if it had anything to do with Voyager's visit.

"About three-no, it's been four years since it moved to the Qizal-Corana system. How time slips away, eh? Well, Quizal-Corana is quite a star system. Quite the system! Caused quite an uproar when the station suddenly disappeared and turned up there."

"The Quizal-Corana system? I've never heard of it."

"I only knew it as one of those places you traveled around rather than through before the Ocampa station moved there. Like I said, that system is a bit scary. It's a binary, and not the most stable system I've ever seen. The station is just one of many smaller objects in orbit. Then there are two gas giants, four metal core planets, and _*three*_ asteroid belts, not to mention several massive debris fields circling and figure-eighting around those suns. With all the erratic gravitational stresses in the system, sometimes one of the planetary bodies gets caught and boom! Another debris field. In time, the debris fields may turn into asteroid belts, I suppose."

"That doesn't sound like the sort of place anyone would choose to move a space station. If it's so dangerous, why did Suspiria..." Kes stopped abruptly, not sure how generally Suspiria's presence was known by non-Ocampa.

"Why did that pet creature of theirs put them there? The story I heard was Suspiria moved them to where they could obtain sufficient energy supplies and materials for building, once she knew she was dying. There are six major shipping lanes that cross just outside that system and not a lot else is out there to service ships, so that may be another reason why she picked that spot. Business is always been booming whenever I stop by. Lots of travelers come through there-and more of them would be traveling in the areas you'd be interested in, compared to here. Maybe they'd have a lead for you to explore."

Kes sighed. "I don't know about that. When I was there about eight years ago with... with some friends of mine, we didn't leave under the happiest of circumstances. There still could be hard feelings."

"Eight years is a long time. I'd say it's worth a try," Jixtan said.

"True. Eight years is a long time to anyone, but especially to an Ocampa. Were you recently?" After Jixtan agreed he had been, Kes asked, "Was there someone named Tanis running the place?"

"Why, yes. A young fellow, a bit self-important, but efficient enough. Did you know him? Oh, no. I don't think you could have. I distinctly recall him saying he was only five years old. You must be thinking of old Tanis, his grandfather. Now he was a strange one! He died-or what do you call it now, 'passed into his Morelogium'-about the time the station got moved. He passed right after Suspiria shriveled up."

If both Suspiria and Tanis were gone, it might not be a bad place to visit after all, Kes thought. "I don't know the way to this Qizal-Corona... oh, it's the Qizal-Corana system, right?"

"That's it. Don't worry, I know the way. Giving you the coordinates will be a pleasure, lovely Kes!"


	5. Altruistic Motives Part 3

_**Stardate 56725.6-September 19, 2380**_

_**Space Station, Quizal-Corana system**_

Captain Jixtan had been a Talaxian of his word, supplying accurate coordinates to Kes. By the time he had to leave the Nekrit Supply Depot two days after they'd met, bound for Sakura Prime, she'd become rather fond of him. He never stopped his outrageous, but entertaining, flirtations with her. Kes didn't really mind. She couldn't help but feel flattered by his attentions. As old as she now was, not to mention looked, apparently she still had what it takes to attract a Talaxian!

Kes also suspected he was lonely. Captain Jixtan was owner, pilot, and entire crew for the _Victorious Morning_, just as Neelix had been a solitary trader, although Jixtan's ship was considerably larger than Neelix's. And, like Neelix, Jixtan had no close family left. His family had lived on Rynax, too.

Before his departure, Jixtan told her three ways to contact him or to leave him a message if she felt his ship could help transporting goods. "Perhaps I could even find a way to squeeze in a few families to bring them to the new home of the Ocampa." Kes was touched by the offer, since it indicated he had faith that she would eventually achieve her goal.

It also made her realize that even when she found a place for her people to settle, the logistics of conveying her people to their new home would be truly mind boggling, requiring an incredible amount of preparation, prioritization of tasks, and a degree of organization her she had not permitted her to think much about beyond the abstract so far. All that, and they'd need to find ships, too. It was premature to spend a lot of time thinking about it now, however. After all, if there were no place to move to, transport wouldn't be needed.

Kes was sitting on the main concourse of the station that had been home to approximately two thousand of her fellow Ocampa for the past three centuries, experiencing that nagging feeling one gets when one feels there is an important message to be relayed to someone else, but you can't quite remember who it is to, or if it was really that important. Kes firmly believed she could not be experiencing _*déjà vu.*_ She really _*had*_ been here before, to all intents and purposes. Perhaps that strange feeling was sheer disbelief she was back on the Ocampan space station. With all that had happened to her here before, she never expected to return of her own volition.

Allowing the flattery of Tanis to tempt her into becoming an aggressor, literally making her friend Tuvok's blood begin to boil, killing the plants in airponics that she'd spent so much time nurturing-these were among the principal memories she hated to revisit. The selfish and cruel dark side of her personality, which she hadn't known she'd possessed, first showed itself here and foreshadowed her later return to Voyager, threatening havoc and death to those who did not deserve it. So "visit the Ocampan space station where Suspiria lived" had never been high on her itinerary until Jixtan talked her into it.

The long-range move of the station had not had any apparent detrimental effects to the physical condition of the station. Its corridors looked much the same as the last time Kes had visited while with Voyager. The colors were different from those she remembered from her earlier visit, stronger, with sharp shadows because of the harsh light flooding into the interior through the viewports from the double stars. One sun was nearly orange and the other almost blue-white, creating intriguing shadows because of the contrasting hues. The artificial orb which Suspiria had provided to illuminate the station when it was located at its former position had bathed it with soft, almost gentle light.

Jixtan told Kes her first stop, once she arrived at the station, should be to the office of Station Master Tanis. He was effusive when she arrived, saying, "I hear you knew my grandfather. A wonderful man! We all miss him so."

Kes was rendered speechless that he knew who she was but wasn't angry with her. Considering the circumstances in which she and Voyager departed from the station, Kes decided to offer the least amount of details possible about the manner of her previous departure. She didn't want to prod the memories of any older Ocampa who might know what happened more accurately than young Tanis apparently did.

Fortunately, Kes didn't have to speak very much. This Tanis enjoyed hearing the sound of his own voice even more than his grandfather had, if his interaction with Kes that day was typical. He nattered on and on, imparting a great deal of information about planets in the sector. He quickly confirmed that Captain Jixtan's knowledge of the facts of the station's move was accurate. When Suspiria finally accepted she was dying, she dragged the station into this system, the best she could do with the strength she had left.

During the week Kes spent on the station, she learned some things that surprised her. While the station was closer to more major shipping lanes than at its original location, on the whole the Ocampa were not happy here. Although life on the station was lucrative, the uncertainty about how long the station could survive in this system dampened their spirits. It might have been different if Suspiria were still around to protect them, but Kes doubted it. Another factor seemed almost as important.

After three centuries of space station living, most of the "station" Ocampa were tired of living their lives in an unnatural environment. They were eager and willing to emigrate to a planet. The ideal situation would have been to move to a planet within the Qizal-Corana system, with the nearby station handling the bulk of interstellar traffic. Unfortunately, as Jixtan had told her, the Qizal-Corana system had no planets or even any large moons with the potential to be colonized by the Ocampa. There may have been at one time; one of the asteroid belts was positioned exactly where one might expect a Class M planet to be.

Kes considered all she had learned of the sporocystian life forms she'd known as the Caretakers. Kes knew it was unwise to generalize when the representative sample of a species numbers only two, but this pair had both exhibited an astounding lack of foresight. They were responsible for the original calamity to Ocampa, when they 'accidentally' stripped the Ocampan home planet of its ability to produce rain. Her own Caretaker had shown a callous disregard for those he considered "lesser life forms," stealing many shiploads of people from all across the galaxy looking to create a "replacement" for himself, and never bothering to send the rejects back home again.

Now add to these faults Suspiria's choice of a planetary system refuge. Kes thought she could give her the benefit of the doubt to some degree. Suspiria was influenced by how far she could travel with the station when she was in failing health. Of course, if she'd faced the truth sooner, she might have been able to take them someplace better. Both of the Caretakers had acted without properly weighing the pros and cons of their actions before jumping in to do them. Kes wondered if this was a weakness of all of their species or if the Ocampa had simply had the misfortune to be visited by a very dysfunctional couple.

One thing was clear: the bestowal of unimaginable power did not mean that wisdom-or, for that matter, compassion-would be received in equal measure. It was a sobering observation, which Kes' contacts with the imperious, self-centered Q had only reinforced.

As she sat at the cafe, trying to decide where she should go next now that she knew those on the station didn't have any recommendations for her, Kes suddenly began to shiver uncontrollably. Grabbing herself around the upper arms and rubbing them to warm herself up, Kes tried to will herself into not shaking. Gradually, she realized that a terrifying event of several years in the past had created a similar feeling. Frantically, Kes scanned the area around her, searching for a person belonging to a species that had once threatened the life of every living thing in the galaxy. None bore the distinctive three-legged physiology of Species 8472, a form which still invaded her sleep with nightmares at times, yet the buzzing inside her head simply wouldn't go away. While she tried to calm her jangled nerves, Kes studied everyone within her line of sight more carefully.

Kes was shocked when she finally recognized them. They were masquerading as fellow Ocampa. So innocuous-looking! Who would ever guess who-or what-they really were?

The "Ocampan woman" was tall, better described as distinguished or handsome rather than beautiful. Her hair was a deep red, but otherwise, there was little to differentiate her from anyone else. The "Ocampan gentleman" sitting next to her had tufts of hair on his eyebrows, pale blue eyes, and a shock of white hair that made him look eighteen if he were a day. He was studying Kes as keenly as she was staring at him.

As Kes felt anger surging through her, she forced herself to become calmer, using Vulcan disciplines Tuvok had shared with her. The last thing she wanted now was to lose control. Her fury could be terrible, as she'd learned to her despair on other occasions. Kes had to control it at all times or risk "losing her way" again. Just because she would have to control her anger, didn't need to avoid confronting them. Picking up her empty food containers, Kes threw them into the nearest recycle bin and strode determinedly to the pair at the nearby table, never breaking eye contact with the male until she stood at rigid attention in front of him.

Kes said firmly. "You can't hide from me."

"No, Missy, I don't believe we can. But what makes you assume we want to hide from you? We don't, particularly-not from you, at any rate. Would you care to join us? I think it's time we had a little chat."

"Joining two members of Species 8472 for a chat! Oh, yes-I know what you are," Kes stated firmly, trying to hold a tight rein on her temper.

"Please," the female person sniffed, "designation by number is a horrid thing, but what else can one expect from the Borg?"

Gesturing towards the empty seat across from him, the masculine entity said, "You can call me Boothby if you want, Missy, and call her Valerie Archer. Those are the names Kathryn Janeway knows us by-although we weren't wearing ears like yours when we saw her last."

"You've met Captain Janeway personally? Did you invite her back to fluidic space to chat, or did you see her out here?"

The one who called himself Boothby projected a telepathic thought into Kes' mind so unexpectedly she had no time to shield herself from it. [[[Please don't speak so loudly about fluidic space here, Kes. The fewer beings that know about us in your non-fluidic space, the better, for now.]]]

Kes was more than a little dismayed by the mental intrusion, but after thinking about it for a moment, decided he had a point. Until she knew what they were up to, shouting out who they were would be more likely to incite panic, assuming anyone in this area of space had ever heard of Species 8472. It wasn't likely to gain her anything.

Using one of the relaxation techniques she'd learned from Tuvok, Kes projected back to him, [[[I can understand you don't want us to use a Borg designation, but what do I call your species then? What is your name for yourselves?]]]

[[[People! That's the only term we ever needed before now! We didn't know any of you existed until our peaceful home domain was invaded by those serially linked killers.]]]

While multiple telepathic communications flew between the three sitting at the table, the Ocampan waiter came to ask Kes if she wanted him to bring another cup of tea to this table to have "with your friends." Kes answered the waiter in the affirmative verbally at the same time she told Boothby, [[[Now that you know about all of us in non-fluidic space, we need to have a way to differentiate you from everyone else. If you don't want us to keep calling you by a Borg designation, would you agree to be called 'Fluidians,' since that's where you come from?]]]

The Ocampan imitation version of Boothby said aloud, in a soft but intense voice, "You people are the ones with the mania for naming everything. Call us what you like, as long as it isn't that damnable Borg number thing! Fluidians is OK by me."

Valerie Archer remarked, "Actually, I rather like it. 'Fluidian.' It has a nice ring to it, and it's very descriptive."

Kes smiled up at the waiter as he placed the tea on the table in front of her. After he had walked a short distance away, Kes asked, "Where did you meet Captain Janeway? After I left Voyager, obviously."

"As my Fluidian self? Or the real Boothby?"

"There's a real Boothby?"

"There is-or was. The real one's passed on, if I'm not mistaken. Someone Janeway knew and respected from her days at Starfleet Academy."

"How did you learn about him?"

"It's a long story, Missy." [[[The short version is we got some from you and from the other telepaths on Voyager when we had contact with you during the Borg affair. And we lifted residual memories from the minds of some Borg drones when we retaliated against them for their attack upon our space. Several had been 'assimilated' at a place called Wolf 359.]]]

[[[The real Valerie Archer was one of the assimilated, you know. I patterned myself upon her. She was quite heroic to the last. Descended from one of the oldest Starfleet families, as a matter of fact.]]] The imitation Valerie smiled sadly at Kes. [[[Through me, she lives again, in a way.]]]

[[[That doesn't answer my question about when and where you actually met Captain Janeway. Stop avoiding the subject.]]]

[[[True enough, although it's not deliberate. Voyager stopped by one of our stations here in the Delta Quadrant, you see. Six years ago. That's when we met.]]]

[[[Your 'Station?' A staging area for invasion, you mean! I don't suppose you'd let me know when you plan to cleanse our galaxy of every living thing!]]] Kes' communication was the equivalent of a shout, making both of the Fluidians wince markedly.

"I admit it was originally intended for that purpose," Boothby said agreeably. [[[The invasion is now on indefinite hold, however.]]]

"You expect me to believe that?" Kes whispered intensely.

[[[If you'd stop erecting those mental barriers, Missy, you'd know I'm not lying to you. A lie is extremely difficult to maintain in mind-to-mind communication. We weren't even aware of the concept of lying until the Borg dragged us into their affairs.]]]

Valerie's mindvoice added, [[[Kes, we aren't planning to 'scour the galaxy of all living things' right now, and hopefully we never will.]]]

[[[You really _*do*_ expect me to believe you!]]]

[[[Yes, Missy, we do. You see, we found out the Borg are an anomaly, atypical of most other entities living here. What can we say to reassure you? Destroying every living thing in this galaxy seemed to be a good idea at the time. It doesn't now. _*But*_ we need to be vigilant. There are some beings here that none of us can trust, Fluidian and non-Fluidian alike.]]]

Valerie added, [[[Jumping to conclusions can be one of the negatives of telepathy, can't it? Whatever one feels about something at any given moment-especially strong emotions like anger or a thirst for vengeance-comes through unfiltered, blocking out anything and everything else. That's what you heard when you first encountered us seven years ago. A very unfortunate 'first contact' meeting, I'm afraid.]]]

"Quite unfortunate," Kes muttered aloud through a tight smile. She didn't know what to believe. "Are you making any more attempts at 'first contact' here?" Kes had turned her head several times during the exchanges, which were the telepathic equivalent of shouting, to see if any of the other Ocampa within her line of sight could sense them. It didn't seem as if any quivered in the slightest or looked around in annoyance while it was all going on.

Kes didn't know if she should thank the Ocampans and the Fluidians awakening her gifts or curse them for beginning her transformation into a being who first had to leave Voyager to avoid destroying it, leading inevitably to the time she had returned, full of vengeance. It was all as confusing as one of those temporal headaches Captain Janeway used to complain about.

Kes thought she had kept these ruminations secret. From 'Boothby's' next thought, however, she realized she had not.

[[[Don't blame us for your own excesses, Missy. We may have been the trigger, but you had the ability inside of that powerful little mind of yours. You were the easiest one on Voyager to communicate with when we needed to do a little sabre-rattling, true. And we _*were*_ angry. Furious. But once we realized there was no unanimity of life form in this form of space and that Starfleet did not have a genuine alliance with the Borg, we also knew we didn't need to kill all life here to protect ourselves.]]]

[[[The Federation and Starfleet seem not be our enemies after all,]]] Valerie thought. [[[but we can't take our safety for granted any more. I guess we should thank the Borg for that lesson.]]]

"You're here to spy on us, then?" Kes said aloud.

"That's another word for it, yes," Valerie replied. "Now that we understand what 'the stakes are' if we're caught unawares again, we maintain a surveillance presence in your space-but not an invasion force. I guess you could call it a cultural exchange program of sorts, too." Valerie leaned forward and whispered to Kes, "I've learned having a body like this has its enjoyable features. Kissing is rather nice, for example. Commander Chakotay is quite a good kisser."

"You kissed Chakotay? Where? When? Why?" Kes had to force herself to lower her voice on the last three questions, since several people at nearby tables turned to look at her when the first question screeched out of her. Kes wondered if they were extremely good at hiding their ability to receive telepathic messages or if most Ocampa really didn't have the talents that Tanis had said they did.

"Archer, stop gloating about that kiss. You won't be getting them any more from him. He's busy kissing someone else now."

"Oh, I know. Even when we kissed, it was a friendly 'exploration of the humanoid body experience' type of kiss, nothing more." From the look that crossed Archer's face at that moment, however, Kes decided she wouldn't have minded a few more explorations of a similar nature.

Boothby leaned over towards Kes and said softly, "I know you don't trust us. I can't say we completely trust you people, either. But thanks to Janeway and her crew, the centralized power of the Borg has been smashed for the foreseeable future, so we're in a more trusting mood, shall we say. We know we aren't exactly on opposite sides, the way we used to think. We're ready to take a chance on some of you, too. Since we _*do*_ bear some responsibility for your mental changes, maybe we owe you and your people a little of our help because of it."

"Do you think you're having an effect on the other Ocampans on the station?" Kes glanced around again but still saw no one who was visibly reacting to their conversations, verbal or telepathic.

Valerie responded silently, [[[We don't believe so. The other Ocampans are continuing with their evolution, but none of them here are as far along as you are. We forced contact with you, so you can sense us. Without that Suspiria life form around to lead them on, most of the ones who have the ability aren't developing it as quickly as they did before. They need an outside push from someone.]]]

[[['Push from someone!']]] Kes suddenly leaned back in her chair as she made the connection, which she immediately knew was accurate. [[[You're the ones who have been listening in when I communicate with Tuvok.!]]]

"What kind of spies would we be if we didn't keep an eye on things every way we could?" Valerie said, leaning back in her own chair. "Isn't that what you're trying to do when you contact Tuvok? And speaking of 'pushing,' what about that psycho-tele-kinetic thing you did when Voyager was about to crash?"

"You knew I did that? It did help protect them a little bit, didn't it?" Kes asked, suddenly wondering if that 'push,' too, mightn't have had a little help from another direction, one she hadn't detected at the time.

"They did crash, but it wasn't fatal. They got their ship back home. I think it's safe to say you helped." Boothby folded his arms in front of his chest, a smug expression on his face, giving Kes the distinct impression he could say more but wouldn't, just to tease her.

He could probably say a great deal more.

[[[You're right, I could, but I'm not. You've had enough to bounce around in that pretty head of yours already, Missy. We accomplished what we wanted to today. We needed to let you know we aren't the threat you think we are, even if you aren't ready to accept it yet. You will in time. That's enough for now.]]]

The only thing he actually said was, "Waiter, bring me the check."


	6. Altruistic Motives Part 4

_**Stardate 56736.8-September 23, 2380**_

_**Pel Clinic, Vidalia, Vidiia**_

Denara slammed the door to her office deliberately: only the presence of her associate stopped her from throwing her file across the room. Dr. Krazel Lem jumped at the sound of her entrance. "How'd it go. Did they say yes? Will we get the funding?"

"How do I know," she said. "The meeting was canceled." Again, she thought to herself.

"I'm sure they have their reasons."

She shrugged. "They didn't tell me. The security guard just told me the meeting had been canceled. At least this time I made it as far as the reception area." She placed her on her desk. "Thank you for covering for me this morning."

"Anytime," Krazel said. "Just let me know when the next time will be."

"There won't be a next time. Mupano's scientists can come here. They'll learn more anyway." She strove to calm down. "Who's the next patient.?"

"Fanatta Kef. He looks good." She smiled at that. Poor Fanatta was only sixteen, but he'd been hard hit by the Phage when he was seven.

"I'll see him." She took a second to compose her mind, then opened the door to the waiting room. "Hello Fanatta, how you doing?" she asked the boy as they moved toward the exam room.

He looked good, there was a definite fading along the scars on his forehead. She was pleased with the results. He raised his left hand. "I can move my fingers now," he said with a slight lisp. Another side effect of the devastation of the Phage-damaged jaw muscles that affected his speech. Even that had improved in the past few months.

"Excellent," she took the offered hand. "Show me." There was only a bit of movement-but that was more than there had been just five months earlier. Fanatta's right hand had more mobility-enough that he'd been able to find work as a sewer worker. If he could have the use of both hands, he might be able to find work elsewhere. He was a rarity amongst her clients-he could at least pay a small fee for her services.

The boy's thrill at even such a tiny movement more than made up for her frustration. If only the Sodality could see and understand that thrill.

"And the headaches?" Denara asked.

"I still have them," Fanatta said quietly. "But I'm willing to suffer." He pulled his hand out from hers. "This makes the headaches bearable."

She nodded. The drugs had some side effects. And the risk was greater if the patient had organs from Kazon 'donors'. Unfortunately many of her patients didn't know the source of their organs. "I'll have Dr. Lem fill this prescription. Let me know IMMEDIATELY if the headaches worsen."

Fanatta hugged her. "Thanks Doctor."

She smiled as he ran out the door. She would keep trying to find funding for the clinic. She had no choice.

* * *

_**Stardate 56739.3-September 24, 2380**_

_**outside the Qizal-Corana system**_

As she departed from the Ocampan space station, Kes felt herself start to shiver. "Like someone just walked over my grave," she said aloud to herself, quoting something she'd heard several times from Voyager's crew. It was a common saying among humans. She remembered the first time she heard it, and how Neelix declared that humans were a "very morbid bunch, Sweeting," when she told him about it. The memory made her smile, quelling the shivering, but far too many of her memories still brought her pain and guilt. For this reason, Kes tried to live in the moment as much as she could.

"This is a cheerful subject to think about," Kes said, again speaking to the empty shuttle. After a moment's hesitation, she said, "Since I seem to want to hear myself talk, maybe I should record my feelings about this in a personal log. Just in case."

"Computer, begin personal log, Stardate... um, computer, supply the correct Stardate, please..." Kes stopped speaking and gathered her thoughts as the mellow computer voice complied with her request. She smiled to herself at her stumbling start. It had been a very long time since she'd dictated a personal log.

Clearing her throat, Kes began again, "Stardate 56739.3, personal log of Kes... of Ocampa... During my years on Voyager I went through many dangerous times, but they pale in comparison to what I endured after I left the Federation vessel. Eventually, I... I lost my way. The powers of the mind Tuvok helped me develop were magnified by my telepathic encounter with Species 8472. Unfortunately, this powerful mind was not immune to suffering a psychotic break.

"I cannot say enough about the many kindnesses shown me by Captain Janeway and the Voyager crew over the years, even when I came back intending to wreak havoc upon them. Fortunately, I came back to my right senses in time, before I did irrevocable damage to those who had once been my friends. They listened to my sad story and even gave me one of their precious shuttles so I could return to Ocampa.

"During the journey home I was completely alone, yet I healed myself. I guess I became myself again. While innocence was gone forever, I again became able to accept responsibility for my own actions. It's strange to think I'd been wiser and more responsible when I first came on board than I was in the months immediately preceding my first departure from Voyager, but it's true. It was almost as if I really _*did*_ live my life backwards, like in the timeline with Linnis-the lifetime that never happened.

"What pains me most is to remember how I blamed Captain Janeway for the terrible things that happened to me after I left Voyager. How could I have ever done that? I'm the one who decided to climb to the surface of Ocampa, long before I even dreamed of such a thing as Voyager-long before I ever met Neelix. If anyone is to blame for that, it's me.

"I owe so much to Neelix, too. I drove him to become part of Voyager's crew because I wanted to be part of it, and later on, I pushed him away from me. I still feel shame at the way I treated him.

"I've tried to make restitution for any wrongs I've done by becoming a better person and by doing things I feel need to be done. I hope I've managed it. I know I've tried.

"After I returned to Ocampa and saw how life had changed there, I knew the Ocampa were outgrowing the caverns and that I was the only one who could help, but I didn't offer to search for a new homeworld for a long time. So many of my past actions had caused as many problems as they solved, and I was afraid of doing something else disastrous. I only found my courage when I saw I would bring doom to my people, sooner rather than later, if I didn't act. How could I live on, knowing I could have saved them but had failed to do so out of fear?

"Because I would have lived on, as a non-corporeal member of my race. I'd expected to have plenty of time, after I'd returned home, to teach my people how to develop their mental powers, the way Tuvok tutored me, and show my people the Morelogium was _*not*_ the end of our mortal existence. It only marked a transition between the corporeal phase and the rest of our lives as non-corporeal beings, creatures of energy, who exist a much longer time. In a way, when the Caretaker called the Ocampa 'children,' he wasn't very wrong. An Ocampa exists for a long time after relinquishing the body we are allotted in this plane of existence-our 'childhood.' Of that, I'm certain.

"To get to the point we can move to the non-corporeal state, however, we must thrive as corporeal beings first. We cannot do that on our home planet. The subterranean chambers are becoming too crowded; resources are becoming too difficult to reach; and it will take too many centuries for the surface to be terraformed to the point it could be comfortable to live there again. Perhaps I would have had time to teach this generation of Ocampa how to tap into the unrealized potential of their advanced mental powers, to prepare them for life as non-corporeal beings, but it would mean there would not be any future generations of Ocampa. We would become extinct. I can't allow that to happen.

"So, though I risk making the wrong choices again, I have undertaken this journey. And this time, I accept full responsibility for all my choices, bad as well as good. If this mission fails, it will be my fault, no one else's.

Kes hesitated, wondering what else she could add. A lot, probably. She had a hunch there might be a lot she should take out-she had rambled more than a little, trying to say what she really felt. Perhaps she would record another log entry later. She'd certainly said enough for this one, but something nagged at her to say one more thing...

"End personal log!" Kes said suddenly, finally remembering to turn off the recorder. She laughed at herself. She wondered how long the computer would have continued documenting her breathing if she'd forgotten to turn it off!

Kes decided she did feel better, having unburdened herself. Better, but the encounter with Species 8472-the Fluidians, she should call them-still disquieted her.

They'd said they had no intention of invading "non-fluidic" space again. Kes wanted to believe them-mostly believed them-or was she being naïve? It was true the Borg had attacked their space first, but that didn't mean she was sure they were trustworthy.

She wished Captain Jixtan were here now so she could speak with him about this. Or maybe she should have tried harder to made room for both Lyrial and Josan to come along with her. There were more ways to contribute to a mission like this than piloting the shuttle! Having someone else to bounce ideas off of, for one. Kes had never felt her solitude more keenly than now.

Kes could add to the personal log she'd just dictated, of course, or maybe she should dictate an official log entry. She'd seldom done them, but she was sure she could remember how.

Then it struck her: Whether or not the Fluidians presented a grave danger to the Federation, she needed to let someone know what she knew. The Fluidians might intercept her communication, but she had to risk it. Perhaps the Fluidians had told her the truth. They really weren't a danger. Maybe they wanted her to let Starfleet know they were still around, ready to protect themselves, but also willing to work with the Federation for mutual benefit. What else could she do, under the circumstances? Some decisions were too big for one person to make on her own.

Kes checked the sensors, making sure no debris fields or other obstacles would be in her way to force a change of direction once she set her course. Dictating her log had not required her complete attention. She could navigate the shuttle while she spoke to the computer, but this was different. Kes would need to concentrate all of the powers of her mind to reach across the galaxy to contact Tuvok once again. To send news to the Federation, good or bad, she could not yet tell.

* * *

_**Stardate 56739.9-September 24, 2380**_

_**ShahKar, Vulcan**_

He opened his eyes suddenly. At first, he thought T'Pel had spoken to him. When he looked at her where she lay stretched out next to him, he could hear her breath and barely see, in the dim light of pre-dawn, her chest rising and falling in the even rhythm of a sound sleeper.

Perhaps he made a slight movement or sound as he studied his slumbering wife, or her sleep may have been invaded by a dream. Tuvok did not know what had caused it, but he could see the result. T'Pel's repose was disturbed in some way. She rolled upon her side and nestled her head against Tuvok's body.

As soon as his wife touched him Tuvok sensed it again, like a cry for help heard from so far away only the barest touch of sound brushed against the eardrums, so soft it could be mistaken for the moan of the wind. Since he was sure, this time, that his auditory sense had not been engaged, he recognized it for what it was: another communication from Kes, from the other side of the galaxy.

Tuvok forced himself to relax into a meditative state. In the darkness of the sleeping chamber, with T'Pel curled warmly at his side, he needed no lamp to open his thoughts to her. Images swirled into his mind.

The first image was of a being twice-familiar to Tuvok. He had been well-acquainted with the real Boothby from his years at Starfleet Academy, but he had also met Boothby's Species 8472 double. While this Boothby's image bore the elfin ears of an Ocampa, Tuvok had no doubts at all exactly whom-or rather what-Kes was showing him. To his knowledge, Boothby was human and had never traveled through the Delta Quadrant. The probability Kes would send the real Boothby's image to Tuvok now was beyond credulity, particularly since Tuvok had attended the revered groundskeeper's memorial service at Starfleet Academy only a few weeks after Voyager's return to Earth. The second image, that of an Ocampan version of Valerie Archer, confirmed Tuvok's deduction.

Tuvok could tell Kes was profoundly disturbed by her encounter with these beings, members of the race which had once let her know they wished to destroy all life in the Milky Way Galaxy. She might think they still did. Tuvok would have reassured her if he could, but in conscience he could not. He hoped they meant no harm. Voyager's last meeting with them after the encounter at Species 8472's replica of Starfleet Academy, which had been transformed into a sort of first contact mission, had been relatively cordial by its end, but that didn't mean all differences had been resolved between them.

Tuvok tried to convey to Kes she should be diplomatic, but watchful and cautious. The feeling-of-connection disintegrated before he finished. And, like last time, there was what he could only describe as 'a sense of intrusion from another being'. For a moment Tuvok was disoriented, almost dizzy. Then he knew the darkened room, was aware of the bed beneath him, felt the warmth of his wife's form stretched next to his, although she was no longer asleep. Her raised head rested upon her hand. Her open eyes regarded him gravely.

"It happened again," she said quietly. "Kes contacted you telepathically."

"Yes. I cannot deny it, nor can I fail to report these incidents to Starfleet. This time, information that may be vital to the safety of the Federation has been communicated to me."

"If the information is that critical, will you trust it to a subspace message or wish to deliver it personally?"

"I believe this news can wait for personal delivery. It may receive a less skeptical reception."

"An astute observation, my husband."

"Since I do not believe I will find sleep again for many hours, we should begin our preparations to leave for Earth at once."

"We?" T'Pel asked.

Tuvok slid out of bed and grasped his wife's hand, pulling her to her feet. "I believe I have adequately explained my desire never to be separated from you again. Unless you have something more pressing which would prevent you from accompanying me..."

"I cannot recall anything of such import. I will begin packing at once. You should arrange for our transport."

As she swept gracefully out of the room, Tuvok was left to ponder how well his wife confronted the vicissitudes of life, with an equanimity which he had yet to completely master despite years of intense study.

Life, as he had also frequently observed, was not fair.


	7. Altruistic Motives Part 5

_**Stardate 56739.9-September 24, 2380**_

_**outside the Qizal-Corana system**_

Kes had become gradually aware of the connection between Tuvok and herself; she was startled by the sudden sensation of emptiness when it broke. She was unsure if her attempt to let him know about the Fluidians had gotten through. She hadn't received any answering images from him as she had before.

Now Kes had to decide upon her next heading. Should she proceed to one of the worlds Tanis had discussed with her? He had not been very encouraging about any of them. Or should she make her way to the one planet which she dreaded to approach, yet which drew her steadily and irresistibly in its direction?

From the beginning, Kes had refused to consider the Vidiian Sodality as a source of aid for her people, yet whenever she was reminded of them, something in her stirred. Since one of her past experiences with the Vidiians had resulted in Kes' donating one of her lungs to Neelix after they'd stolen both of his, revulsion was the emotion she thought predominated, although even that had been tinged with pity. The Vidiians had done many terrible things in the name of survival, but Kes knew how terribly the Vidiians had suffered, thanks to having met Denara Pel, the Vidiian physician and Phage-sufferer who helped Voyager rescue Captain Janeway and Chakotay from New Earth.

Had Denara and her people really been cured? If so, why were they so seldom seen? Although feelings would naturally run high against the Vidiians among the other races, surely they would have made some attempts at reaching out if they were alive-wouldn't they? What if the cure had not been what totally effective? Denara-was she still alive or had the Phage killed her before a cure had been found? Assuming there had been a cure.

As Kes reviewed all she'd learned about the Vidiians, she also remembered one other thing: if there was one thing she knew she'd done right, it was to follow her instincts. Whenever that small voice whispered inside her brain, she had followed its lead, whether to triumph or disaster. This time the voice was screaming in her mind, and it was telling her to go to Vidiia.

She checked her instruments. The shuttle was flying smoothly under its own power. Kes set the navigation controls in the direction she felt compelled to go and engaged the autopilot. She needed some sleep before she could give her little ship its customary push to speed it on its way at "Warp 9.99999."

At least if she went to Vidiia she would find the answer to some, if not all, of her questions. Since she knew the name of one person who might help her, Kes felt better about her chances for success. Kes devoutly hoped she could find Dr. Denara Pel. That Dr. Pel might be in a position to help Kes and the Ocampa in some way was probably too much to ask. Kes asked for it anyway.

* * *

**Act 3:**

_**Stardate 56797.2-October 15, 2380**_

_**Pel Clinic, Vidalia, Vidiia**_

Dr. Denara Pel leaned against the gray and peeling wall and let out a loud sigh. There was no one else in the small exam room to inquire what the problem was. The problem. She smiled sardonically at that thought. She would be happy if there was only one problem. She'd be happy if she could only name five problems.

She opened her office door hard, the sound of it scraping the floor still causing her to cringe-even after six years of listening to it. Dr. Krazel Lem was sitting at the desk. He looked up, a look of concern on his heavily scarred face. "You should go home," he said.

"I can't. How many more?"

"Too many. I hear that Dalar's clinic has sent their overflow patients to us, again. Denara...Dr. Pel, I must insist. Please. At least take a half hour and rest?"

She shook her head. She just felt frustrated at the whole situation: the long days, the lack of funds; the lack of interest from her own government. She was trying to save her own people! She didn't bother to hide her bitterness "They said it was a miracle. A cure for the Phage. Our people went wild in celebration. The treatment was distributed...We all believed..."

"Does it really matter where the Antiphagia came from? It worked," Dr. Lem said. "The last Phage case was five years ago."

"Yes," she said with another loud sigh. "It worked." She ran her finger along the deepest of the many scars on her face. For her, the cure's arrival had been timely. She had been lucky. The treatment improvised by Voyager's Doctor had slowed down the ravages of the Phage just enough; she had not had to make the choice of dying or finding transplants.

"The scars are superficial," Dr. Lem said. His own face showed the ravages of the Phage and the several transplants he'd undergone.

"Are they?" she asked. "We lived, but our people are now doomed to die anyway."

He smiled. "Perhaps not. You aren't the only one looking for a treatment for the Antiphagia's side-effects. And maybe someone else is interested? Like maybe a large corporation? Mupano has responded to your letter, personally this time." He held up a thin packet.

She reached for it, not sure whether to be hopeful or cynical. The clinic needed to find a source of money. They would be forced to close soon without it. Many of her patients were too poor to pay any fees, and she couldn't turn them away. Any of them. Even those who'd had dozens or more transplants; or had been private organ collectors, the Hanatta. At least former Hanatta could afford to pay her.

"Well? Aren't you going to read it?" Dr. Lem said.

She opened it, and as she read the first paragraph her heart leapt with tempered joy "Mupano Tar is willing to meet with me personally to discuss the clinic and our research." It was a short letter, but once again she believed in the basic decency of her people and maybe in hope. "He says our work is too important to simply disappear." She smiled. "Lem, I'll be late tomorrow morning."

"We'll manage." His grin was lopsided, the two sides of his face needed major repair. He shared a common history with many of their patients-they also couldn't afford the massive costs for the reconstructive surgery.

* * *

_**Stardate 56800.3-October 16, 2380**_

_**Mupano Industries main office, Vidalia, Vidiia**_

"...I absolutely must have it by next week, at the latest...Uh-huh... Right... Look, I'm in a very important meeting now, and I'm due at another in just a few minutes. Get back to me on this in about two hours. I should be free to talk about this more then...Yes, very good. Talk to you then."

As he switched off his hand-held communicator, Mupano Tar turned to his visitor with a sigh. "I'm so sorry, Dr. Pel. I don't know why my people feel they need my approval for every little detail when I've chosen them for their good judgment-and why they always seem to need the most guidance whenever I'm in a very important meeting! I'm very concerned about the tragic circumstances so many of our people are in. I truly do want to help." He reached for the insulated teapot his secretary had brought in shortly after Denara's arrival.

"Some Poaly tea?" Mupano Tar said as he poured a cup. He glanced her way. She was still surprised at how healthy and how Vidiian he looked. She wondered if he was one of the small percentage who'd never been infected, or if he'd had reconstructive surgery. Considering the look of distaste from his secretary when she'd arrived-and the fact she'd only seen unscarred Vidiians in his office-she suspected he had never been infected. There was an easy way to find out-if she'd had her scanner with her. But such scans were considered a rude invasion of privacy-and considering her own status as a Phage victim, could become rather embarrassing for her.

"No, thank you," she said, with growing impatience. They had been interrupted five times in the past hour. From the way that last call had ended, Denara doubted she'd have much more of the industrialist's time, and they had still to get past the preliminary social niceties.

When Mupano's attention had been snatched away from their meeting, Denara had had plenty of time to look around her surroundings. His new office definitely indicated he could afford the surgery-if he'd even needed it. The collection of alien pottery and rugs alone was probably worth more than she'd see in her life. Her own clinic was six years old and showing its age. Her patients paid by helping around the clinic-when they could. It had never been the efficient, clean environment she'd often dreamed of-like the Sick Bay of Voyager. She smiled as she remembered Dr. Schmullis.

"So, as you were saying about your research..."

"I've been working on several fronts that are showing great promise with medications that will be able to successfully treat Antiphagia-related infertility, as well as provide affordable ways for the general public to be treated cosmetically. We've already developed indictable medications which reduce the amount of scar tissue around surgical incisions, as well as some which lighten or darken the skin so that the patchiness of..."

Mupano's communication device buzzed. "I'm sorry, Dr. Pel," he said, as he turned away from her and began to speak to someone named Ronen Loa. Denara tried to rein in her frustration at still another break in their discussion, just when she was finally starting to become enthusiastic about their meeting. As desperate as she wanted financial support for her work, she was again doubting if becoming involved with one of the grand movers and shakers of Vidiian high society was a good idea. Mupano was well known for his charity and philanthropic pursuits; as well as rumored to have been instrumental in finding the Antiphagia.

When Mupano Tar finally turned back to her, apologizing profusely for still another interruption to their meeting, Denara waved her hand offhandedly, as she said, "I understand completely how busy you are, sir. I just wanted to give you the information you need to make your decision about the worthiness of my work so that I might qualify for a grant to further my research."

"I have no doubt about the worthiness of your research, Dr. Pel. However, there are many others who are also requesting my financial assistance. I need to..."

Mupano's console beeped. When he responded, Denara heard his officious secretary's voice. :::Commissioner Veldon is here for your meeting, sir. You asked me to let you know as soon as she arrived.:::

Mupano's eyes met Denara's apologetically as he replied, "Yes, of course. Please have her brought to the Onyx Conference Room. Tell her I'll be right there. I'm sorry, Dr. Pel. We're very interested in learning more about your research, but I have another meeting. My assistant, Dr. Lendar Klim will accompany you to your clinic. Thank you for your time. I hope we can continue doing business." He left quickly. A second later the door opened again, and an unscarred Vidiian female entered. She grimaced at the sight of Denara, but Denara thought she covered it well.

"Dr. Pel," Lendar said. "Mupano is sorry that he is unable to discuss your work in greater detail with you personally, but as head of Mupano Industry's Research and Development department, I am well qualified to ascertain the usefulness of your work."

"Usefulness?" Denara said as the transporter beam started to dematerialize them. Usefulness?

"My work," Denara continued after they'd rematerialized in her clinic. She spoke quickly to hide her irritation, "My work is very useful." She pointed toward the patients sitting in the waiting room. Dr. Klim barely glanced at the waiting patients.

"Of course. I didn't mean to imply otherwise. Mupano always looks for the bigger picture. Like, what are the collateral benefits of your research?"

"Collateral benefits?" Denara glanced around. "See that boy over there?" She pointed at a sixteen year old. "I've been able to restore much of his epithelial tissues. A young man at the beginning of his life is feeling more confidence in himself and is starting to feel he will be able to contribute to society and is choosing his life's work. Isn't that a 'collateral' benefit?" This time, Dr. Klim didn't bother to hide her pained look of disgust. Denara gave up controlling her anger. "I thought my goal of restoring our people to their natural looks...and restoring their fertility were important goals for _*all*_ our people..."

"I must not have made myself clear. While there's no money in treating patients, Mupano does want to help. After all, having well over fifty percent of the population unable to reproduce..." Dr. Klim tittered at her own joke, " is bad for business...No consumer growth potential." Denara politely smiled at the awful attempt of humor. Dr. Klim was overdoing the sales speech, but Denara was still interested in hearing more about the funding. "But the money has to come from somewhere, thus our interest in the practical-or rather economical-aspects of your research. I would like to arrange time when you aren't so busy to go over your work."

Denara hesitated. She wanted more information before committing to anything. "I'm never not busy, but I can clear some time. Tomorrow afternoon? I'd like more information on how you are planning to help."

"We can discuss that the day after tomorrow in my office. From what information you have sent us, and what I've seen, I think we can make arrangements that will be mutually advantageous."

"Mutually advantageous?" Denara didn't like the sound of the those words.

Dr. Klim faced her, her perfect smile stretched across her perfectly unblemished face. "If we can develop some additional products from your research to sell at a profit, we can make enough extra so you can afford a few luxuries with your share of the sales! That never hurts now, does it? So, I look forward to our talk. Good afternoon."

"I'm not sure..." Before Denara could finish her sentence, Dr. Klim disappeared as a transporter beam took her away. She had spent years struggling to maintain her integrity and principles in a society that had lost theirs. "Nothing has changed," she whispered to herself.

Dr. Lem walked over. "What happened? Is Mupano interested?"

"Oh, I don't know. If they're willing to fund our research, should I be put off because they seem to have a more pragmatic agenda? They want to make money from our work. A LOT of money. I shouldn't complain, I guess, if it means they'll be able to fund other worthy projects as well as ours-and still have enough to make themselves even filthier rich than they already are..."

"The world is changing, Doctor. We may have to get used to it."

"And if I don't like what it's becoming?"

Krazel had no answer for that. As he turned to leave, he paused. "Oh! Some stranger was looking for you."

"Who?"

"Some old woman, she didn't leave her name. Alien. She knew your name though."

"Alien?" Denara frowned. She had no idea why an alien would be looking for her. She shrugged it off. "Go to lunch, I can handle this."

* * *

_**Stardate 56806.1-October 18, 2380**_

_**Vidalia, Vidiia**_

Denara Pel sat down at her desk and activated her computer terminal. The numbers that appeared were depressing. She had not entered medicine to make money-but the clinic was barely breaking even. She'd have to get a second job-if she could find one-to pay the bills. She debated making her evening meal before tackling the bills, but knew that she would then fall asleep, and the work would still be there tomorrow.

If Mupano financed her clinic, she wouldn't have to worry about the bills-and she could hire another clinician and up-date her equipment. It was a heady dream, one that had always been impossible to achieve...until now.

So, Mupano wanted to make money-was that so bad? She would like to make a little money, move into a better apartment, take a vacation. Her last vacation-if it could be called a vacation-had been those few days on Voyager.

Her thoughts wandered to Dr. Schmullis and Voyager. She'd heard that Kazon pirates had captured Voyager, but the crew had managed to reclaim their ship...That had been seven or eight years ago. Too long ago. Since then, she'd not heard anything about the ship. She silently wished them well, as she started the process to chose the bills she would pay first. It wasn't easy. The energy bill was overdue and they were threatening to cut the power to the clinic again. She needed to request that the Sodality grant her clinic an exemption. She sighed. The Vantar Pharmaceutical bill was due now too. And the rent on the clinic was due.

She'd picked the two bills when the lights flickered. She swore silently. Power outages were a too frequent occurrence. That was something she would add to her list of things to do with Mupano's money-an independent power supply for the clinic.

She continued working. The lights flickered again. She opted this time to shut down her computer and make dinner before the power went out for the night. She started to stand, when a knock at the door caused her to freeze.

No one called at night. If, or rather, when the power went out, anyone outside was a potential victim. Even those who were supposed to protect the citizens, hid at night.

Only a real emergency would send someone out to the streets at night. She couldn't afford to be included in the communication network, so the only way for her patients to summon her for a late night emergency was to find her.

"Who's there?" she called out.

"Is this the home of Dr. Denara Pel?" a faint voice said. Denara wasn't sure if she recognized the voice or not. It seemed somewhat familiar. She went to open the door.

"Yes, may I help you?" Denara asked the heavily cloaked figure.

There was a faint laugh, as the woman revealed her face. She was Ocampan. Denara knew only one Ocampan. She stared at the woman for several seconds before she was able to ask, "Kes?"

"You remember," Kes said.

Denara wanted to ask a lot of questions, but a quick glance around the dim streets reminded her that outside was too dangerous. "Come in. Why are you here? And HOW did you get here?" she asked, the questions coming out in a long string. "Is Voyager here too?"

"No, it's just me. My story is too long, and perhaps a bit unbelievable. For now, I'm here, and I need your help."

Denara wished she had more light to study her guest. Kes was much older than she remembered. She vaguely remembered something Doctor Schmullis had said that the Ocampa had a short lifespan. "How can I help you?" Denara asked after a long silence. She offered to take Kes' cloak. Again she was amazed at how old the other seemed.

"I know the Doctor told you some of how Voyager ended up on the wrong side of the galaxy."

"Captain Janeway destroyed their only way home to save your people."

Kes nodded once. "I left Voyager a little over a year after our last contact with you and made my way back to my people. They survived-but what the Caretaker left for us in terms of energy and resources is fast running out. We need to find a new home."

Denara shook her head. "You saw what it's like out there. My people are unable to help themselves." She growled slightly, but didn't add unless there was money to be made.

"I'd heard you found a cure for the Phage," Kes frowned, "but I had no idea until I arrived just what that meant." She hesitated. "Maybe this was a mistake..."

"The Vidiian Sodality controls a number of planets we have no use for. You can ask, but..." Denara didn't hold out much hope for the cooperation of the Sodality.

"They'll want something in return." Again Kes hesitated. "My people have nothing to give in return, except a presence on some uninhabited planet, to help you maintain your claim against the other species in this sector."

"It could be enough. The Sodality doesn't want to lose control of any of our territory." The thought made Denara furious. "They continue to fund a military to guard our territories but cut funding for saving our people..." She stopped to regain her temper. "Did you have a particular planet in mind?"

Kes pulled out a chart and pointed. Denara glanced at it and frowned. "It's definitely uninhabited. Anyone who settles there would have to undergo a complete vaccination routine." She didn't add that she doubted the Vidiian Sodality would fund such a program.

"I understand. We had to leave the Captain and Commander there because of that virus. The serum you gave us, led to the development of a cure-and vaccine." Kes smiled. For the brief second, Denara really recognized the waif like woman she'd known on Voyager. "I remember the Doctor's research. We can take care of developing and administering the vaccine."

Denara smiled. "I'm glad. But, I no longer have access to such things...I'm just a lowly Phage-victim." She muttered the last line to herself, but the way Kes glanced at her, she suspected the Ocampan had heard her.

"I hope you didn't get in too much trouble."

Denara laughed bitterly. "The Captain didn't even notice. He was so fixated on capturing Voyager, he forgot honor..." She didn't continue. The Phage had destroyed her people-and the Antiphagia was a cynical justice. "Do you know what happened to Voyager?"

"They made it home just recently," Kes said. Denara smiled.

Good, she thought. Those people deserved it. "Would you care for anything to eat?" Denara asked, as the shock of seeing Kes starting to wear off, she remembered her manners.

"Denara, I'm fine. I have plenty of food on my little ship."

Denara again, wanted to ask more questions, but realized there was much Kes hadn't told-and probably wouldn't tell. Kes smiled at her.

"But don't let me stop you from preparing your own dinner."

Denara worked silently for several minutes to prepare the boiled Tiluga, while Kes sat in her one chair, apparently meditating.

"I don't know anyone who can help you," Denara said after the long silence. Her Uncle Drin had retired a few weeks ago and moved away from the city-he didn't have enough influence with the real powers to have been useful in this situation.

"I had hoped that maybe you knew someone with some connections." Kes looked up. "I'll approach a Sodality council member..."

"Wait," Denara said suddenly, "Perhaps I do..." She wasn't sure she liked the idea. Mupano would probably want more than the Sodality would for his help. "Maybe I do know someone. Mupano Tar. He's thinking of funding my research."

"You don't like the idea," Kes said softly. "Or do you not like him?"

Denara thought about her answer. "He's a business man. His interest is in profit, mine is in helping my people. He wants to use my research to make a profit."

"Yet he is willing to help you," Kes said. "Perhaps he has more heart than you give him credit for. He'll want something from us in return, won't he?"

Denara nodded several times as she stirred the Tiluga.

"A new market?" Kes asked. "As colonists on a Vidiian planet, we would be buying and trading for Vidiian goods. And perhaps after we've establish our colony, we could export food to Vidiia."

"I don't know. Mupano might be interested. But that's a long term benefit-he'll want something now."

Kes looked away. "I might have something," she whispered. "As a last resort."

"I'm meeting with his assistant the day after tomorrow, I'll ask her if I can meet with Mupano."


	8. Altruistic Motives Part 6

_**Stardate 56811.3-October 20, 2380**_

_**Mupano Industries main office, Vidalia, Vidiia**_

"I'm sorry, your name again?" Dr. Lendar Klim said with more than a hint of distaste in her voice.

"I'm Kes." From that point onward, Dr. Klim had ignored her. Kes couldn't help feeling sorry for Denara. There was no excuse for such rudeness. She decided she also felt sorry for most of the people of Vidiia, if this is how the Phage victims were treated by their own kind. She knew too well how outsiders felt about the Vidiians.

Kes took advantage of being ignored by meditating. She had decisions to make-like just what could she or the Ocampans offer the Vidiians in exchange for a planet-and their help? She had some ideas, but after listening to Klim speak down to Denara, she wasn't sure these were the people to help the Ocampans. If Klim represented the general attitude of Mupano Industries, then maybe she should go elsewhere.

Except there was nowhere else to go. So, what ever she offered would have to be _*worthwhile.*_ Her own abilities were definitely _*worthwhile,*_ but she would not let anyone on Vidiia know about her skills unless it was absolutely necessary. That left the paragithium. She looked up, wondering how Denara could sound so calm.

"All companies need profit," Dr. Klim said. "Without profit there is nothing..."

Kes closed her eyes. Klim sounded so...Ferengi. It might be fun to introduce them to her and see who could use the word profit the most in a paragraph.

She opened her eyes again. Denara was speaking. "Thank you for taking the time to discuss this with me. I look forward to hearing from you soon."

"I will be recommending that we fund your research. You are well organized, despite your circumstances, and your research has met our standards. I also believe that the benefits will be substantial. And your friend?"

"Kes. Yes, she would like to talk with Mr. Tar..."

"Ahhh." Klim glanced at Kes. "Mr. Tar is a very busy man; he doesn't have time for trivial things."

Kes kept her temper. "I can assure you, Dr. Klim, that I am not talking about anything trivial. I understand very well that I need to make his helping me and my people worth his while-and I believe I can do better than just 'worth his while.' " She knew she would have to offer something at this point. "Would a way to improve energy supplies be of interest?"

She was pleased with Klim's reaction. Good.

"I'll talk to Mupano." Klim turned to face Denara. "Good day."

When Dr. Klim had gone, Kes and Denara were escorted out of the meeting room in a very efficient manner. Kes did not feel inclined to say much more than Denara did-which was to say, nothing. Denara's only utterance was a big sigh that seemed like one of relief.

When the two had been hustled out the door and were well down the street, Denara finally broke her silence. "I must apologize for how that meeting went, Kes. She shouldn't have ignored you like that."

"Why? The clinic is getting the support it needs. You don't need to apologize for this Dr. Klim's rudeness when telling us good news. You aren't responsible for any actions but your own."

"Maybe, but I brought you with me, even though I always feel so uncomfortable around her. Dr. Klim is knowledgeable, I must admit, but providing treatments for Phage victims is being totally overlooked in favor of 'profit.' I'm beginning to wonder if I'll ever be able to hear that word again without cringing!"

"That attitude isn't unknown away from Vidiia, you know," Kes said. "In fact, there's one race from the Alpha Quadrant whose entire culture is based upon profit. I met a couple of them once. Profit was just about the only thing they ever talked about."

"Were they crew members on Voyager? I can't recall anyone like that when I was with Schmullis," Denara said incredulously.

"No, the two I'm talking about were only in the Delta Quadrant by accident. It's a long story and a funny one, but I think I need to go back to the clinic now and rest a while or I'll never be able to tell you the whole thing!"

"I understand totally," Denara laughed. "I'd like to take a long nap myself-after a nice long shower, to feel clean again."

Kes studied her companion's face. Even the scar tissue masking her face couldn't hide the fatigue Denara tried so hard to conceal. "You work too hard, you know."

"Thank you, Kes, but I have to. They need me."

"I understand," Kes said, feeling a kinship to Denara at that moment. After all, Kes was here on Vidiia because her own people needed her. She started to say good-bye, then reached out both of her hands to give Denara's a squeeze. The Vidiian physician had always struck Kes as a good person, from the first time they'd spoken together on Voyager. Kes consciously tried to pass along a little of her own strength to Denara; she needed it.

* * *

_**Stardate 56811.6**_

_**October 20, 2380, Pel Clinic, Vidalia, Vidiia**_

"Well?" Dr. Lem asked.

"She will recommend that Mupano fund our research," Denara said. Her voice was neutral.

"That's great," Krazel said. "When do we get the money?"

"I'll hear later today. I'm meeting with Mupano late this afternoon." She looked around. "I suppose we could start figuring out what we need to do first."

"Where do we begin? How about a new building?"

"That might be a good idea," Denara agreed. "Except none in this area are in better shape than this one, and I don't want to move away from my patients."

Krazel frowned. "Then we hire some additional staff. Your friend has been wonderful. Are you sure she's not a doctor?"

"She was trained by one of the finest physicians I ever met, but she's not a doctor."

"Ahh. Kes is wonderful. Frindap smiled today while he was with her. I haven't seen him smile for two years. Are you sure she won't stay?"

"I wish she would too, but she's here on behalf of her own people."

"And anymore, neither of you will tell me." Krazel shook his head. "I won't say I understand." He paused. "You should eat. Kes told me to remind you."

"I'll eat. I promise. You'll be okay this afternoon?"

"I'll manage, even if I survive by thinking about all the help we'll be able to afford."

"Don't start getting grandiose ideas, we haven't had the grant approved."

"Yet," Krazel added. "Mupano is too intelligent a businessman to refuse you."

That's what she was afraid of, Mupano's interests were too single minded. Research did not follow time schedules or budgets. "I hope so." She picked up the file off her desk. "Well, back to work."

* * *

_**Stardate 56811.7-October 20, 2380**_

_**Mupano Industries main office, Vidalia, Vidiia**_

"Welcome Dr. Pel, You are the Ocampan, Kes?" Mupano asked Kes. Denara wondered at the need for such an obvious question.

"Yes," Kes replied. "I'm representing my people."

Mupano blinked. "I thought..." He waved a hand as if to wipe out his thought. "We'd heard the Ocampan had been destroyed. It's good to see those rumors are unfounded."

"There is an element of truth, sir," Kes said. "Our homeworld cannot support our growing population. We're looking for a new planet."

"I see." He glanced at Denara with narrowed eyes. He returned his attention to Kes. "And you were hoping that I would sponsor your request to the Sodality?"

"Yes, sir," Kes replied. "My people understand that while we have little to offer the Vidiian government, we do know that we can't expect such a request to be granted with nothing in exchange."

"And what might that be?"

Denara smiled to herself as she watched the exchange quietly. Kes had Mupano's attention-yet she wondered just what the Ocampan could offer.

"When the Caretaker died, he made sure my people would survive. One way was with..." Kes hesitated. "A way to enhance our limited power supplies." Denara noted the hesitation. Kes was very astute-she didn't mention exactly what the Ocampans could offer, just a hint of what it could do.

Mupano lifted an eyebrow. He was interested, Denara noticed. Good.

"And this method? I would like to have my scientists examine it."

Kes laughed-a beautiful melodic sound. "Sir, I don't have it with me, but I would be willing to share _*part*_ of what I know. Just enough to show that what we have is real."

Kes didn't need to say, 'but not enough that you could duplicate it without our help.' Denara was also interested. Such a device would help her clinic. Kes glanced at her and nodded once. Very quickly. Mupano didn't seem to notice.

"I'll contact Dr. Klim." He glanced at Denara. "Will Kes be staying with you?"

"Yes, she will," Denara said.

"Good. I'll contact you when the Sodality notifies me when they want to meet with you." He smiled. "And I have arranged for twenty-thousand Dremaa to be transferred to your clinic account. Lendar will handle all the paperwork." He knelt by a cupboard. "May I propose a toast." He pulled out a decanter of purplish liquid. "Spindo brandy." He poured three glasses and handed them out. "To a better future for all our people."

Denara agreed quietly as she drank the warm liquid. Such a drink was so outside her budget, she'd never had it before. She could understand why someone would pay approximately two years of Denara's income before bills for a small bottle. Spindo Brandy was marvelous.

* * *

_**Stardate 56817.4-October 22, 2380**_

_**Vidiian Sodality offices, Vidalia, Vidiia**_

Chimeral Dop, President of the Vidiian Sodality, stood when Kes and Denara entered his office. "Welcome to my office," he said with a small bow. "And congratulations, Dr. Pel. I understand Mupano Tar has agreed to sponsor your research. Research I might add that will help all Vidiians."

"Thank you, sir," Denara said, biting off the bitter retort that she'd only had to go begging for money when the Sodality had cut her funding. Dop was a Phage victim. His reconstructive surgery was very good, but there were little things she'd noticed that gave him away-like the small scars around the eyes and a slight puckering at either side of his forehead from replacement tissue which had to be stretched to fit the expanse of his broad brow.

Chimeral Dop turned his attention to Kes. "Mupano Tar has told me of your situation. I have discussed the matter with my fellow delegates. There are-" he motioned for them to sit, "-many difficulties with your proposal. The planet you requested, while not inhabitable at this present time, is still of interest to the Sodality."

"Yes sir," Kes replied. "I realize that. The presence of the Ocampa colony would further the Vidiian claim to the planet. The Ocampans are capable of developing a vaccine for the virus that plagues the planet. We'll only need viral cultures or serum."

He nodded. "I'm sure you understand our reluctance. But, there are other problems: recently the Kazon and Haakonians have been seen in that sector. If they knew there was a cure for that virus, they would attempt to conquer you, for no other reason than they can. There are others, including the Krowtonan Guard. And there are rumors of another species from some sort of parallel space. I'm afraid you are asking too much of the Sodality. We cannot take such a risk-and we are reluctant to announce to the other species that there is a cure."

Chimeral hesitated. "And there are several delegates who refuse simply because of your prior connection to Voyager. Even if you cannot have any contact with them, anymore. They must have been destroyed by now." He mumbled the last sentence, but Denara was certain he meant for them to hear his comment.

"No, sir, they made it home," Kes said softly. Denara hoped Kes would explain more of how she knew this.

He stared at her. "And how do you know this? Their home is on the other side of the galaxy."

"I have limited contacted with them," Kes said. "Telepathically."

Chimeral laughed. Kes hadn't admitted this to Denara, but Denara knew that Kes wasn't lying. This must be the part of the story she'd said was unbelievable.

"I'm sorry," Chimeral said when he'd stopped laughing. "But the Sodality has voted..."

"Sir, Voyager represented the Federation. Do you know what that is?" Kes interrupted.

Chimeral shrugged. "It's not important. The Sodality..."

"The Federation is an organization of many worlds, species, cultures and ideas, united for the common good and protection of everyone. Imagine such an organization here."

Chimeral started laughing again. "Kes, the political reality is simple. We are Vidiian. We have few allies in this sector."

"I can contact the Federation..."

"No," Chimeral said. "We would need to speak with them directly-not through a biased medium." Clearly he did not believe that Kes could actually contact someone over 70,000 light years away.

There was a second of silence, then Chimeral stood. "I regret not being able to help you..."

"Would you reconsider if _*you*_ could talk to them?" Kes asked. For the first time Denara heard a hint of desperation in Kes' voice.

Chimeral laughed again. "If-and that's a pretty big if-I could talk to a representative of this Federation, I would consider it."

"I'll arrange it." Kes bowed politely. "Thank you, President Dop, for your assistance. I'll contact you when everything is ready."

Denara controlled the urge to smile at the look of complete shock on the President's face. She didn't say anything to Kes until they were on the street.

"Now what?" Denara asked. "I'm just sorry we can't help..."

"Don't be sorry. This is exactly what I'd expected would happen. Even you find my story hard to believe, but you still believe me. Come with me."


	9. Altruistic Motives Part 7

_**Stardate 56817.9-October 22, 2380**_

_**Southern Vidalia, Vidiia**_

Despite reassurances from Kes that they would be safe, Denara still looked around nervously as they stepped off the Vidalia Express not far from the industrial wasteland that bordered the Vidalia's southern district, Horspant. This place was notorious.

"We'll be fine," Kes said reassuringly.

"I hope your ship is still here," Denara whispered, afraid that someone might find them if she spoke louder. They'd been the only ones to get off the Express at this stop.

"It is. This way." Kes smiled.

"I'm surprised the security patrols let you land here. Didn't they even warn you about this place?"

"Denara...They don't know my ship is here." Kes started walking faster, straight toward the graying wreck of some old factory. "The people who live here are desperate. They have lost everything, but they leave me alone."

"I tried to set up a clinic here," Denara whispered. "Just before the Antiphagia was found." She sighed. "After the government troops forced the treatment on them, they wanted nothing more to do with me."

"They have learned to rely on themselves," Kes replied in an equally soft voice. "They don't trust anyone. I've tried to make friends with some of the women." Kes glanced at her. "They are highly suspicious of strangers. They have emotional wounds that go beyond the Phage." She hesitated. "Denara, how was the cure found?"

"There are rumors, but no one seems to know. For millennia our only goal was finding the cure, but the best results were temporary. We made significant advances in medicine, but at a horrific cost: organ harvesting became big business." Denara snorted in disgust. "Then one day, the Sodality announced they had a cure-and all infected Vidiians were required to be treated. The uninfected were tested. It was another year or so before we learned what the adverse reaction to the treatment was. My people are dying," Denara snarled. "And the Sodality says it can't afford to keep us alive. Those who received the treatment are sterile."

Kes shook her head sadly. "No wonder the people here are so angry."

"There was always a bias against the victims. My own family threw me out when I became ill. I don't even know if any of them are still alive." She would have gone on-talking helped distract from the overwhelming smell of poor sanitation and other wastes. She was surprised at the lack of people about. Kes stopped and looked around. Denara wondered if she had also noticed the lack of people.

"Something..." Denara froze at the tone of that word. Did Kes sense something wrong?

"Is something wrong?" she asked when Kes didn't speak or move.

"No...nothing." Kes took a deep breath. "This way." She lead them toward a shed. Denara turned to look behind her, then blinked several times. Kes was no longer beside her. Then the door to the shed opened. "In here. It's still here," Kes called out.

"What...Oh the ship." The shift to near darkness blinded her for a second. "It's from Voyager?"

Kes nodded. "It's too long a story. And one I'm not particularly proud of." She closed the door to the shed. "I'm going to try to contact Tuvok."

Denara just nodded, wondering if perhaps she should offer to help. She wasn't telepathic, she couldn't even begin to think how she could help. Kes leaned against the shuttle. "Are you all right?"

"Fine," Kes answered. The Ocampan looked like she was elsewhere. "That's strange."

"What's strange? Maybe we should do this later?"

"No, no. I'll be fine. Just a little dizzy." Kes placed a hand on Denara's shoulder. "I need you to stand guard. If anything happens-anything, wake me out of the trance."

Denara wanted to ask more questions, but Kes had entered the shuttle.

"Guard?" She looked at her hands. "I don't have a weapon. Just how am I going to defend us?"

"Don't worry, just wake me," Kes said from the inside of the shuttle. "Relax."

"Relax?" Denara brushed the worst of the dirt off a crate and sat down. She jumped at a scuffling sound. It was outside the shed. Probably a feral debarl, she thought. Packs of the loose animals were attracted to places like this. They were known to attack anything that moved.

"It's not working," Kes said from the shuttle entrance. "I can't..." She collapsed. Denara flew to her side.

"Kes?"

"I'm more tired than I thought," she said as Denara helped her up.

"Perhaps we should try again when you're rested?"

"Perhaps..." The door to the shed rattled. Kes closed her eyes, Denara stepped back in fear. "Let them in," Kes said. "There's only one."

"Who?" but she obeyed. A elderly, scar-covered Vidiian stood outside the door.

"Hello Kes," he said as he entered. "And you must be Denara." Denara stared at him. She didn't recognize him and how had he known their names?

It looked like Kes was forcing herself to not faint, Denara decided. It seemed to work. "He's what I call Fluidian. They have the ability to change their shape."

The Fluidian who looked Vidiian (Denara had no clue what a Fluidian was) chuckled, then held out his hand. "Kes, you'll have to let go of your inner self and just trust me."

Denara watched in a state of even greater confusion as Kes, after several long seconds, reached out to take this Fluidian's (or whatever he was) hand. "What in the name of the Gods, is going on," she muttered when she was again alone. "And just what is a Fluidian?"

* * *

_**Stardate 56819.1-October 23, 2380**_

_**San Francisco, Earth**_

He was where she expected him to be, the place where he went to escape the pressures created by the consulting work Admiral Paris had cajoled Tuvok into accepting. Despite decades of living among humans-as well as some species even more volatile, Tuvok required more time and solitude to complete his personal meditation routines before he and T'Pel withdrew to their bedchamber for their joint meditations every night. Alicia Paris' greenhouse had become his chosen spot for this time of contemplation.

Twice since their evening meal, T'Pel had checked upon her husband's mood. Both times, the furrow slashing between Tuvok's brows while he stared at the orchid in his hand conveyed that it was not yet time to disturb him. The first day they'd arrived on Earth, Tuvok had purchased this orchid along with three other specimens of differing species to bring home to Vulcan for his own collection. At the time he'd anticipated their visit to Earth would last for a few days at most. Now four weeks had already passed, but the date they would be able to return to Vulcan had not yet been announced.

Now T'Pel was beginning to wonder if Tuvok's orchids had become permanent additions to Alicia Paris' greenhouse.

Tuvok may have retired from active duty, but Starfleet was unwilling to let him remain retired once he reported the images he had received from Kes. It might have been seen as an amazing coincidence if not for Voyager's encounter with the Species 8472 training habitat versions of Commander Valerie Archer, missing in action at Wolf 359; and Starfleet Academy's late, much lamented head groundskeeper Boothby, among others. Starfleet desperately needed to know what the intentions of Species 8472. Admirals Hayes and Paris asked Tuvok to stay on Earth, hoping one of these mysterious communication would occur around the watchful eyes of Project Pathfinder. Since Tuvok understood how vital this was to Starfleet, he consented to remain as a guest of Admiral Paris. T'Pel, of course, stayed with him.

This time when T'Pel went to the greenhouse, while his face was somber, his brow was no longer furrowed. T'Pel called out softly, "Are you ready, my husband?"

Tuvok looked up at his wife and shook his head in assent. Slowly he arose, placed the orchid pot back on its hook, and followed her into the house proper. Ascending the stairs, they entered their room, and lit the lamp, all without saying a word to one another. They had completed these tasks so many times in their lives, they had no need to direct each other to do them.

When all was in readiness, Tuvok took his place at one side of a black-lacquered antique Japanese table, which was low and perfectly designed for their purposes, while T'Pel kneeled down at the other. Tuvok touched his fingertips together to form an upside-down "V" shape, but he did not meet T'Pel's steady gaze. Instead his eyes looked far past her, seeming to focus upon something outside of the room's window.

"Tuvok? Is something wrong?"

"I do not believe so, but I have experienced a... strange sensation for the past half hour. There is no other way to describe it."

"Perhaps Kes is calling you from across the galaxy?"

That caught his attention. Arching a skeptical eyebrow, Tuvok stared at his wife, who calmly returned his stare. "We shall now begin," he said.

T'Pel gracefully bobbed her head slightly to acknowledge him and mirrored the position of his hands. Silently, T'Pel began to initiate their shared meditation ritual, her eyes fastened upon the steady flame of the lamp.

Their hands were very close to each others but not quite touching, but T'Pel could almost follow the beating of his heart. That was very odd. It distracted her from what she was doing to a sufficient degree that T'Pel began to wonder if this was the strange sensation he had reported to her.

Although they usually meditated in a parallel fashion for several minutes before touching each other and continuing the ritual together, T'Pel felt compelled instead to overlay his hands with her own at once. She surrendered to the impulse...

And suddenly, though her eyes were open and she could see Tuvok kneeling before her, she received a mental image so strong she could almost see, superimposed over him, three other figures, shadowy, as if they were images painted onto a dusty window. She closed her eyes to concentrate on the visions and gasped as she recognized two of the figures. One surely was Kes, looking much older than in the holographic representations Tuvok had shown her; the other closely resembled the old groundskeeper from Starfleet Academy, Boothby, who had helped her adjust to the ways of humankind when her husband had first been assigned to be an instructor there. T'Pel had attended his memorial service the previous year. The third figure appeared to be female, one who was badly disfigured by what appeared to be patchy scar tissue. Only then did T'Pel notice that the Boothby figure's face also appeared to be marred by scars. The mouth of the Kes figure never moved, but much to T'Pel's surprise, a mellow female voice sounded inside her head. [[[Tuvok! I'm so glad. I was about to give up.]]]

[[[Kes? Where are you?]]]

[[[I'm on Vidiia with Dr. Denara Pel and Theby Booth. I think you knew him after I left Voyager.]]]

T'Pel was not sure whether Tuvok was having more trouble controlling his emotions after they heard that than she was, but T'Pel knew she was not helping him at all, as she sometimes could. If a telepathic voice could "shake," Tuvok's was accomplishing it then. [[[You are making telepathic contact with me from Vidiia?]]]

[[[Yes, I am. But I have help from 'Theby Booth.']]] One of the images, the one that looked like Boothby, dipped his head in acknowledgment.

[[[You are from the station constructed by the species from fluidic space?]]] Tuvok responded.

A raspy human bass voice echoed inside T'Pel's head. [[[We have decided we like being called Fluidians, Commander. Congratulations on avoiding that Borg terminology.]]]

Tuvok exhaled abruptly, then thought to his wife, [[[Get the admiral.]]]

T'Pel jumped to her feet and hastened towards the door. As soon as she broke physical contact with Tuvok, the figures and voices disappeared. It was only when her husband grunted aloud, "I've lost contact," that she realized they had disappeared for him, too. She knelt down next to him, suppressing the sudden reaction of dismay that she sensed emanating from him as well as herself. She touched his shoulder to comfort him... and the figures and voices returned, as strongly as before.

[[[Whatever you just did, Tuvok, don't do it again! I must talk to you. We need your help!]]] Kes' head leaned forward in supplication.

[[[What I did was stop touching T'Pel... and it is not the first time that I have sensed your thoughts when she was touching me, although never in so clear a way.]]]

[[[That's because I'm here, helping the two of you communicate. I can't keep this up for long. We need to find another way. To get help from some of these Vidiians, Kes has to be able to really 'talk' to you. How good is that device your people from that Project Pathway developed?]]]

T'Pel felt Tuvok's hand shake for a second. He brought himself under control and replied, [[[The Project Pathfinder device is very good, but not good enough to use to speak with anyone on Vidiia at present. We would have only seconds before the link would be severed. That could be sufficient, however, to send a compressed data stream of messages.]]]

[[[Would this shuttle's comm system be able to receive such a transmission from you, Commander?]]]

[[[I do not believe so... Theby Booth. It would not be powerful enough. The schematics for the system are in the shuttle's computer, Kes. You should remember how to download them. If you are there with Dr. Pel, may I assume you may have access to someone on Vidiia who could help you recreate it, but on a larger, more powerful scale? That should be well within the capability of Vidiian technology.]]]

T'Pel detected a ripple of the amusement she had noted in the past when Kes had communicated with Tuvok. This time, along with the telepathic thought, the vision of Kes moved her lips as they received, [[[Oh, yes, Denara has introduced me to some people who would be eager to review the plans to build a sophisticated communication device-and even more delighted to build one for us, as long as they were given the right to build more for themselves! And yes, I remember how to download.]]] From the startled reaction of the image of the Vidiian next to her, Kes must have spoken aloud this time so that Denara Pel knew, for what must have been the first time, what they were projecting to each other across the galaxy.

[[[As long as you receive something of an equivalent nature in return, to 'trade' for it.]]] Tuvok answered.

[[[Commander, I'm getting tired. This communication must end.]]] The Boothby image seemed to waver a bit, looking like it was about to slip into another form, knobby, with the wrong number of appendages. Kes also suddenly looked weak and ancient, as if fatigue threatened to overwhelm her. [[[Commander, we're going to cut off now, before Kes collapses. We will contact you again, to let you know of our progress.]]]

[[[Wait, let me see if the admiral is...]]] Tuvok ceased his attempt. The images had flickered away. Tuvok sighed. "I would like to know how Kes has been able to do what she has just done-and what that Species 8472-the 'Fluidian'-has done to help her. Plainly, that other consciousness we detected in the past intruding in the past was him, or one of his people."

"I would give much to have been able to reach Admiral Paris, so that he could have been a part of this, too," T'Pel said.

"I doubt he would have noted anything other than our acting somewhat strangely, as Dr. Pel must have done on Vidiia. But I must report all we have learned to him now. I believe we will need to include Mr. Barclay, since he has the most experience using the MIDAS Array in... unique circumstances."

"I understand, my husband. I will be here, practicing mental disciplinary techniques, until you are free to resume our meditations. This time, I trust, without outside interference."

Tuvok stroked the side of T'Pel's face gently, as she had longed for him to do. Then he jumped up with as much alacrity as T'Pel had ever seen and strode out the door at an accelerated pace, calling for Admiral Paris.

She did not expect to see her husband again for many hours. She did not.

* * *

**Act 4:**

_**Stardate 56819.6-October 23, 2380**_

_**Mupano Industries main office, Vidalia Vidiia**_

"Sir," the flustered secretary, "I'm sorry." Mupano looked at Denara, then Kes, then back at his secretary. The box they were carrying must have piqued his curiosity.

"That's okay." He stood as the secretary closed the door. "I normally prefer the usual niceties-like appointments, but your call intrigued me. I've cleared an hour. This had better be good." He motioned for them to sit down. Denara sat, but Kes remained standing even after Mupano sat.

"It is," Kes said as she slid the box across his desk. "I've contacted the Federation and they were able to send me these: the instructions for a long range tachyion transmission communication network. With this Mupano Industries can create a communication network that is 100 times faster than subspace signals and has a greater range."

He was already studying the diagrams. "The energy costs would be very high," he muttered after several minutes.

"I have a solution for that. Paragithium."

"Hard to find and costs too much to buy," he answered.

"Not necessarily."

Mupano looked up. "Not necessarily? With a large reliable source of Paragithium you could come close to buying your own planet."

Kes smiled. "That's exactly what I'm doing. We don't have the facilities or equipment to mine more than a little bit at a time." Denara wondered if perhaps the Paragithium was on Ocampa. She figured Kes wouldn't tell at this point.

"Hmmm." Mupano stood. "I'm definitely interested." He smiled at Denara. "I would say this hour could be well worth our time. If you don't mind I'd like Lendar to examine this, as well as others of my staff."

Kes glanced at Denara who understood her reluctance to deal with Dr. Klim, but all she could do was give a quick nod. "That is acceptable," Kes said. "You do realize that there are some details I can't go into-until we have a firm commitment from everyone."

"I understand, completely," Mupano said. "Well, Kes, if Lendar and Tycos find this as fascinating as I do, not only will we have a deal-but there may be more funds available for Dr. Pel's clinic and research." Denara glanced at him quickly, then at Kes. Mupano must have caught her surprise. "Dr. Pel, consider it a finder's fee. This could be the single most important discovery in centuries. But there's no point in boring you with details that are still subject to change." The door opened, and two Vidiians entered, Mupano introduced his associate, Tycos Indorin, while Lendar started to look through the files.


	10. Altruistic Motives Part 8

_**Stardate 56900..8-November 21, 2380**_

_**Project Pathfinder, San Francisco, Earth**_

"It's like looking for a needle in a damn haystack," Admiral Paris grumbled to himself, as he stared moodily at the vast star chart on the wall. A small section of the Delta Quadrant was highlighted; at the center of the indicated area was a single bright star: Vidiia.

Tuvok did not allow his own expression to change, although deep down he felt a tingle of excitement, mixed with apprehension. He glanced over at the Admiral, who repeated once more, "A damn haystack."

The technician manipulating the vast MIDAS array paid no attention; doubtless, he'd heard it all before. But Lieutenant Barclay, nervously twisting his hands together, said, "Actually, Admiral, that analogy isn't quite appropriate. You see, a needle could theoretically be _*anywhere*_ within the haystack, but we know-"

"Reg," Commander Harkins said warningly.

"-within a few microparsecs precisely where our needle, that is, the Vidiian communication center, is supposed to be. Compared to the first time we attempted to make contact with Voyager, this is much simpler..." Barclay at last ground to a halt, perhaps finally aware of the penetrating gaze of the Admiral.

"You're quite right, Lieutenant," Paris said finally. "It should be easier this time around. But that still doesn't mean I'm feeling sanguine about our chances of success."

Something about the Admiral's tone caught Tuvok's attention. Was Paris concerned that their attempt to contact the Vidiians would not succeed, or that it possibly might?

He was saved from further speculation when the technician called out, "I've got them, sir!"

"On screen," Paris ordered.

"Sorry, Admiral, audio only," the tech replied.

"You'll have no more than a minute, maximum," Harkins said swiftly.

"Understood," Tuvok said. Simultaneously reaching out with his mind, he said, "Kes?"

"Tuvok!" came the immediate reply. "It's so good to hear your voice!"

"It appears our attempt at contact was successful," Tuvok said. "However, we have not much time. The communication window will be open for only another 42.5 seconds."

"We've experimented with paragithium for circuitry to lengthen the window for information exchange and increase power efficiency," Kes said. "I suggest that you do the same on your end."

"Understood." Behind him, Tuvok heard the low hum of voices. Doubtless the Pathfinder scientists grasped the significance of Kes's statement and were discussing its feasibility. "Our next test contact, which we will attempt in twenty days on Stardate 56955.6, will be of longer duration."

"I'm looking forward to it," Kes said warmly.

"Five seconds, Commander," Paris warned him.

"Until then, Kes."

"Goodbye, Tuvok. Give my love to your family and-"

"Sorry, sir, the communication window closed," the tech said.

"As expected," Tuvok said, stifling a sudden stab of disappointment. He turned to Paris. "Admiral, what is the next step?"

"The first thing to do is implement the paragithium network," Paris said. His facial expression had not brightened; if anything, he looked more morose than he had earlier. He let out a deep sigh. "And then it will be time to take this to Admiral Hayes and the rest of the General Council."

* * *

_**Stardate 56975.6-December 18, 2380**_

_**Sodality Hall, Vidalia, Vidiia** _

President Dop frowned when they entered Sodality Hall, Denara noticed. "Probably didn't expect to see us again," she whispered. Kes just smiled.

Mupano Tar chuckled. "His frown will lessen when he hears what we brought with us. Are you sure the Federation is ready?"

Kes nodded, Denara was impressed that the Ocampan didn't look nervous, even as the other delegates turned to study them.

"I'll handle this," Mupano whispered to Denara. "Members of the Sodality, esteemed guests," he said loudly. "About two months ago, a request was brought to the Sodality by a representative of the Ocampan People. With the support of the Federation-an organization located on the other side of the galaxy-Mupano Industries has built a communication device to speak with their representative."

Anything else he would say, was drowned out by shouts from the delegates. President Dop rang a handbell in a vain attempt to silence the hall.

Finally, his voice was heard over the ruckus. "This delegation will be dismissed and offenders will be fined if there is not silence NOW."

"Mr. President, the Vidiian Government is not in the habit of negotiating with murderers and thieves," a tall female said in a very loud voice just before she sat down.

"We aren't?" someone else shouted. President Dop rang the bell again.

"I suggest that the Ocampan delegation and Councilor-Delegate Loa join me in my office." Dop glanced at Mupano. "Mupano Industries engineers are finished installing this communication device in my office?"

"That is correct," Mupano said.

"Then, I suggest this meeting is adjourned until later." Dop rang the bell.

"Here's to success," Mupano said as he motioned for Denara and Kes to go before him.

"To success," Kes whispered.

Denara gripped Kes' hand more tightly as she realized they were expected to speak to the Federation representatives. No one had mentioned that to them before. She glanced at Dop. From the whispers between Dop and Loa, she thought they were surprised too. She leaned close to Kes and asked, "Are you all right?"

"Just nervous. I think I'm now just understanding this is the easy part."

Denara smiled. Easy? But then again, maybe Kes was right. If the plan succeeded, Kes would return to her people and plan that move. Just how does one move over a million people anyway?

Denara didn't have time to wonder about that anyway. They'd entered the president's office. An impressive console was on the wall showing the gray and green seal of Vidiian Sodality. Dop glanced around the room several times. "I believe the interests of the Vidiian Sodality and the Ocampan people would best be served if Dr. Denara Pel and Kes would make the initial contact." Dop then activated the screen. The image flickered, then faded out to a solid green. Suddenly there was a hiss and the entire screen turned into an angry gray and white ocean. Then another image appeared. A uniformed humanoid being with a fringe of hair only above his ears and a solemn expression was visible.

"I am Admiral Paris."

"Dr. Denara Pel, representing the Vidiian Sodality," Denara responded automatically, not sure of what she was going to say next. She'd rather expected to see Captain Janeway or maybe even Dr. Schmullis, not some unknown human. If his name was Paris, though, could he be related in some way to Tom Paris, from Voyager?

Her companion saved her from having to speak again. "And I'm Kes, representing the Ocampan People. Thank you for listening to our request."

"It's not every day I have the honor of being involved in such a historic meeting," Paris said.

Dop moved to stand behind Denara. "I'll take over," he whispered.

Denara was relieved. "Sir, I'd like to introduce the President of the Vidiian Sodality, Chimeral Dop."

She stepped to the back and after listening for several minutes, slipped out the door. To her surprise, Mupano Tar followed.

"What was that about?" she asked.

Mupano chuckled. "I think Dop was afraid that he'd be dealing with that Starfleet Captain... Janeway. We both know that she has many reasons to distrust us. I gather she would trust you." Mupano shrugged.

"Personally I'm relieved. I wish I knew if I was needed here."

"I know you must be anxious to return to your clinic." Mupano said. "And I must be returning to my office. Have a pleasant afternoon." Mupano departed quickly. Denara hesitated three seconds, before following him out. She silently wished Kes well, but her clinic waited. She couldn't afford to spend the day here, sitting and staring at gray walls.

* * *

**Epilogue**

_**Stardate 57274.7 April 9, 2381**_

_**Ocampa homeworld**_

The central plaza, once a cafeteria where the Ocampa lined up meekly to receive their food rations from the Caretaker, was the throbbing heart of the Ocampan city in the caverns beneath the earth. The underground city had always been their refuge from danger, whether those enemies were a hostile natural environment; careless extragalactic explorers; or neighbors with conquest on their minds. Now the plaza was their "capital city" within a city.

Today, as ever, Kes spent virtually every second exchanging greetings, enthusiastic waves, and smiles with her grateful people. Kes the Explorer had returned home and was hailed as a heroine once again as soon as the plans for the salvation of the Ocampa were presented. While some of those who greeted Kes were special friends who rated much more than a wave, it sometimes seemed that everyone knew her. Much to her surprise, she seemed to know all of them, too.

"Hello, Carys! How are you doing today?... Kiran, the Transport Assignment Team meeting was postponed until tomorrow. Can you still come? Excellent!... Everyone agrees that was a great idea, Raquiris. Vertris is presenting it to Council tomorrow morning for their consideration... Why, thank you, Julan! I do feel wonderful. Keeping busy must agree with me!... Yes, it is an exciting time, isn't it, Penan? We're just getting started... . "

"Auntie Kes!"

At the shout, Kes turned full circle and saw her friend Tyeris coming towards her, followed by her brood. Kes happily accepted hugs from the children Andryes, Linnis, and Neelan. "Hi, there! You know, every time I see you, I just can't get over it! You three aren't supposed to be so grown up yet!"

"I can't believe it sometimes myself," Tyeris admitted.

Kes had to reach far up to hug Neelan, who was as tall and gangly as his father Benan. The twins Andryes and Linnis were only a little taller than Kes. She always had to look carefully to see which was which; they were truly identical and sometimes played tricks on their boyfriends by switching places. Kes always felt a little choked up when she saw them. Kes had been asked to name the children, a great honor to any Ocampa but an especially significant one for Kes, who had never had a child of her own. They'd left childhood far behind by the time Kes returned in triumph two months before, but they had not yet traded the coltishness of adolescence for sober adult. "Auntie Kes" hadn't missed their entire journey to adulthood-just the greater part of it.

They all chatted amiably for a time-too short a time, as far as Kes was concerned, since she had a late afternoon meeting. As she waved good-bye to Tyeris and her almost-grown brood, who were homeward bound while Kes still had to endure a Logistics Oversight Group meeting, Kes realized she must have looked very much like the triplets not so long ago, as beings of other races measured time. "Not so long ago" is a relative concept, as Kes well knew. "Ten years! A lifetime for an Ocampa-as a corporeal being." She smiled to herself as she stepped into Council Hall, where her meeting was being held.

There were many jobs to complete and pieces of the puzzle to put into place before the corporeal Ocampa could emigrate, but Kes couldn't stop herself from looking forward to what would come afterwards, when they were settled in their new homes. "Then I'll teach them what the Morelogium truly means," she thought.

* * *

_**Stardate 57274.9 April 9, 2381**_

_**Ocampan homeworld**_

Her meeting, mercifully, lasted barely an hour and a half. Afterwards, Kes walked briskly towards the crowded little apartment she shared with Josan, Lyrial, and their children Benaren and Alixas, born a month after Kes returned from Vidiia. "You see, I was right about your Elogium, wasn't I, Lyrial?" Kes had teased. "I'm glad you saved my luggage, but I think you need the room for your family! Maybe I should move..."

They wouldn't hear of Kes living anywhere else but in her little alcove off the main room of the apartment. As long as they were careful to keep the dwelling tidy, there was enough room for them all. Benan had managed to rig the apartment to fit two cribs, two storage compartments, and two toy boxes within it, in addition to everything else it had always contained. "Auntie" Kes had to be careful where she stepped, though, because no matter how vigilant the rest of the family was, somehow Benaren always missed one of his toys during clean-up time, and it would lurk underfoot, waiting to trip the unwary. Lyrial confided to Kes, whenever they talked about the colony, "It will be nice to have a little more room now that the children are getting so big."

"It will be nice to have a little more room" was being said in most of the apartments in the caverns now that the prospect was no longer a fantasy. But if the waiting was hard, yet so would be the leaving. For better or worse, this had been home for many generations of Ocampa. Leaving all the familiar places behind would be difficult for everyone.

When she finally reached the final corridor to the apartment, Kes surrendered to impulse. She strode past her door and entered the hydroponics cavern. At this time of the evening, only the skeleton night crew would still be there; where she was headed, everyone would be gone.

Kes had spent many happy hours in the potting shed with her parents Martis and Benaren, planting seeds and transplanting seedlings to larger pots to set out in the main farming area outside. Today she went there once again, to the place where she felt closest to those gentle spirits who had gone before her into the non-corporeal world.

"Mother, Father, are you here?"

There was no response. She didn't really expect one, although she opened her mind as far as she could to reach out to them. Even so, she never felt discouraged. Her parents may never have learned the mental disciplines needed to reach back to touch her mind, but she was sure they did hear her, somehow. "I'm going to miss our talks when we're gone, Mother and Father. These caverns will be silent until they collapse into each other and are no more, but your spirits will still be here. Please forgive us for leaving you; it's the only way."

Kes sat on one of the benches along the wall. "Today I saw my friend and her children-triplets, can you imagine that, Mother! Imagine having had three of me! It made me think about you, about how you always encouraged me to forge ahead to wherever my curiosity wanted to take me. I was just about the triplets' age when I decided to climb to the surface and see the sun. The very day they were born was the same day I finally made up my mind to look for a new home for the Ocampan people. And now the triplets themselves will be among the pioneers settling a new world beneath another sun, building a new society light years away from the place we have always called home.

Kes stopped speaking for a moment and looked around, feeling a little foolish at the grandiose way she was speaking. "Maybe I should bring my PADD when I come here. Then I could say I'm working on my Personal Log if anyone saw me here," she said with a little laugh. "I don't think anyone would really care, though. A lot of our people are doing the same thing in their hearts as they get ready for the Great Migration. And they all think I'm crazy anyway!"

Closing her eyes, Kes rocked herself back into a more comfortable position on the bench. "I know you don't know what a PADD and a Personal Log are. They're things I learned about as I lived my life-the life you predicted for me when I was first born, Mother. You thought I would 'see the sun' someday, and I did. Not just this sun, either, but many of them-planets and stars and nebulae, too. You would have loved seeing them. We've been hidden away underground for so long, we Ocampa have forgotten how they look. That won't be a problem soon. The stars are a little different over our new home, but the children will be able to see them. I hope they will thank us for giving them a chance for a new life.

"We can't get there without help. People from the other side of the galaxy will ferry most of us, but some of our near neighbors will help, too. It's not without risk, of course. There will be many challenges we will have to overcome in order to become part of the greater community. Coming out of hiding means exposing our people to enemies, you see. Some we already know about; some we don't; but our people have accepted the dangers that go along with the rewards. What is most exciting to me is that once the pros and cons were explained to them, the Ocampa were still eager to go to New Earth.

"New Earth. A couple of very good friends of mine first called it that. It's a good name for people making a new beginning, don't you think? I've never been prouder of anything I've done in my life than I am of this, because by going there, we'll be helping others as well as ourselves.

"Many different races and species, some formerly enemies and now friends or, at least, allies working together, working to find a way for everyone to get what they need without hurting anyone else to get it. That's the way the Federation works, at the other side of the galaxy. When I traveled with my friends on Voyager I learned about it. I think it's a great model of how to get along. It isn't perfect, of course. Nothing is. And it won't be easy to do. It takes a lot of sweat and toil to do something worth doing, but now the Ocampa will be part of that effort. The Federation will be establishing an 'embassy' on New Earth, where we're making our new home. Maybe we here in what they call the 'Delta Quadrant' can learn from them and build something like their Federation someday.

"We won't start to actually leave for New Earth for a few months yet. Some of the elders don't intend to leave at all. They've already told us, 'Emigration is for the young. We'll face our Morelogiums here, in the place where we were born and raised our families. We will remain here, so our homeworld will still belong to the Ocampa in spirit.' Thanks to them and to you and to all the generations that have moved on to the spiritual realm, our homeworld will still be inhabited by the Ocampa. I hope all of those who have passed to another state of being will understand why we have to go. I'm pretty sure you will.

"I've really got a lot to do now, organizing the move. My days are full; the list of tasks I have to finish keeps getting longer and longer; but everywhere I go, people tell me I actually seem to look younger and more relaxed now. I don't feel like someone pushing eleven, either. I seem to be getting younger all the time.

"Once I actually _*did*_ keep getting younger and younger. I became displaced in time and lived my life backwards. Truly. That's when I heard you say you thought I would see the sun someday, Mother." Kes stood up in front of her bench, stretched a little of the stiffness out of her back, and began to pace back and forth in front of the bench as she spoke. "I'm sure some people would say I was just having an hallucination or dream, but it _*felt*_ too real not to have happened that way. I loved getting those glimpses of you, so long after you'd left me behind. I sometimes wonder if I would have ever have had the courage to climb to the surface to see the sun if you'd both still been alive. Some of the things that happened to me afterwards on my journeys were unpleasant, to say the least; but if all the pain and hard times I endured are the price our people had to pay to get this new chance, then it was worth it. I brought back a great gift-hope. Hope for the future, when for so long we had none.

"It's getting late. I don't want to get the people I live with worried, so I really should go. I'll be back again before we leave. Maybe I'll bring my PADD next time to dictate my 'personal log'-or maybe not. I do feel better just having had this chance to speak to you again, whether you can hear me or not. Good night!"

Kes walked to the doorway to the potting shed, and stood there for several minutes, listening. The shed was dark and empty and overflowing with memories of days and people only she could remember. She waited for some sign of... of something-she didn't know what-but she heard nothing with her ears or her mind. She never had, but that didn't matter. This was the place where she felt her parents' presence most keenly. As she stood there, a sensation of something unseen and unfelt brushed through her soul, and she felt she had been heard.

Kes took one step out the door before turning around and facing back into the potting shed. She smiled enigmatically. "Oh, by the way. If you really don't want to stay here all alone, you can always fly with us to New Earth. I'm sure you can find the way. I'll make sure to leave a star chart here for you, just in case. I know you'll be welcome."

**Fin**


End file.
